


The Smell of Rotten Parchment

by StarScreamLoki



Series: Courting Death [1]
Category: Loki - Fandom
Genre: (not worth mentioning) implications of smut, Angst, F/M, Feelings, Hurt/Comfort, Loki (Marvel) Does What He Wants, Loki (Marvel)'s Lips Sewn Shut, Loki's POV, POV Third Person, loki is a little shit, mentions of torture, thor doesn't understand
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-30
Updated: 2018-10-15
Packaged: 2019-06-18 22:23:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 12
Words: 33,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15495996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarScreamLoki/pseuds/StarScreamLoki
Summary: Punished for his crimes against Midgard, Loki is given into Thor’s custody who brings him to the Avengers because he has a mission on his own. Loki’s lips are sewn shut and he doesn’t want to have the threads removed, harboring a secret only Thor knows. The Avengers on their turn have a new team member. Beautiful, mysterious and very deadly, and she doesn’t take any shit from the God of Mischief, but slowly Loki starts to realize he is not the only one with a secret, and Helheim be damned if he doesn’t figure out what her secret is so he can use it, or her, to his own advance.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> What started as an idea for a little one-shot ended up in a 12 chapter fic in just a matter of days, and I regret nothing! I so much enjoyed writing this that I’m already planning a part two (and three and four) and (I think) that by the time the last chapter of this fic is posted, the new one will be ready. Of course I have a certain trademark and this fic is not short of a ton of angst, action and some horror-elements. The idea was to make it a 3th POV Loki x Reader but it ended up way more Loki-centred and from his POV along the way, and yet again, I regret nothing. Enjoy reading (and crying) this and please leave behind some comments on what you think of this because I’m very curious!

Thor took off Loki’s muzzle and a gasp went through the room, faces awestruck. Bruce was the first one to make a move, stepping towards the God of Lies.

Loki took a step back while putting his index finger in the air, rattling the chains around his wrists with the movement, and his eyes shooting daggers at Bruce.

“Loki…” the scientist started, “let me get that out for you.”

Loki intensified his glare and made a low growl in the back of his throat, his eyes set wild but with the unmistakable intend of murder in them.

Bruce shuddered under his threatening glare and looked helplessly at Thor, not understanding.

Loki gave Thor an impatient glare and held out his chained wrists.

Thor sighed, his demeanor filled with annoyance. “You promise me that if I take off those chains you will not harm them,” Thor said threateningly, grabbing the chains.

Loki shrugged and put up a feint, innocent smile, at least he tried too as the threads sealing his lips together wouldn’t fully allow that and he grimaced.

“Brother…” Thor gave the chains a tug, the metal biting in Loki’s wrists.

Loki rolled his eyes but one look at Thor told him his Thor wouldn’t take of the chains off if he didn’t consent to his demand. Reluctantly he nodded while snorting a sigh through his nose. Thor gave him one last warning glare before he took off the chains.

Immediately Loki felt his magic return to him and within mere seconds he had fabricated an illusion of himself covering his true appearance. He didn’t mind looking battered and bruised but at least he could make his illusion speak. “Took you long enough,” he berated Thor.

“Do not make me regret taking them off, Loki,” Thor said venomously and shook the chains he was still holding.

“Okay, stop it right there! Can somebody please tell me what is going on!” Tony interjected before the brothers would start fighting. “I mean, you show up on my doorstep with your brother in chains who looks like hell - no offense Reindeer Games - and without any explanation you take off those chains while the last time we saw him he tried to take over the earth and murder us - again no offence. Please do explain!”

Loki sighed and rolled his eyes again and moved for the bar, muttering some words under his breath.

“Where do you think you are going?” Tony demanded more than asked.

Loki just kept walking to the bar and raised an eyebrow at Stark. “You still owe me that drink,” he said casually and pulled a bottle from the shelf, opened it and sniffed its contents and decided it would suffice. As Loki brought the bottle to his lips his brows furrowed. Although his illusion could talk, and therefore open its mouth to drink something, his true form could not. Angry he put the bottle down, almost shattering the glass.

“Yes, please do explain,” Clint said with one eye on Thor and the other warily eyeing the God of Mischief who gave him a predatory grin, sending shivers up Clint’s spine.

“The Allfather has given me a mission to accomplish. Yet, the target of that mission is somewhere on Midgard, although I do not know exactly where, and thus I returned.”

“That does not explain why  _he_ is here,” Clint spat pointing at Loki.

“Loki has been sentenced for his crimes on Midgard. He has been placed under my custody and I could not leave him behind on Asgard while I’m meant to keep an eye on him,” Thor sighed which drew another murderous glare from Loki who was still fidgeting with the bottle of alcohol, it’s contents still locked away from his grasp.

Bruce walked to the bar and rummaged through the cabinets while eyeing Loki warily, whose feeling were completely mutual and acted the same towards the scientist. Bruce pulled out a glass and a straw and placed it on the bar and carefully backed away, leaving the God to figure this concept out for himself. Loki wasn’t stupid and sighed in exasperation.

Natasha, who had been silently listening during the whole ordeal finally spoke up, “and why are his lips sewn shut?”

“Because it hurts less than your muzzle,” Loki interjected sarcastically while giving the Widow an exhausted glare.

“That can’t be more comfortable than that,” Bruce offered eyeing Loki with some confusion.

Loki raised an eyebrow and seriously questioning the intelligence of the mortal. “I really can not phantom why you need to know the details, for it is not of importance. Thor is going to find his target and we can get out of here as soon as it is allowed.” Loki advanced towards his brother, the scorn clear in his voice but Thor knew better and briefly caught the threatening look he got from Loki to not tell them the true reason his mouth was sewn shut.

It was silent for a moment before Bruce spoke up, “can I at least remove the wires? It does not look healthy and it might infe-”

“NO!” Loki shouted, his illusion briefly wavering at his outburst and Bruce took an involuntary step back.

Thor put a hand on Loki’s shoulder. “Brother please, control your anger. You do not want to antagonize Bruce or-”

“Yes, yes, or the green monster comes out,” he interrupted Thor with apparent irritation but briefly flinched at his own words. He briskly shoved Thor’s hand off his shoulder and walked back to the bar, smirking at Bruce while he passed the man.

“Is he going to help in this mision of yours?” Tony asked Thor while nudging his head towards Loki.

“I am actually more concerned for my safety, or better said, that of the earth,” Clint spat. “How are you so sure he won’t harm us?”

Thor held up the chains. “ _If_ Loki is intended on harming anyone, I’ll put these back on for they seal of his magic,” and he gave Loki another warning glare.

Loki made an angry noise at the back of his throat at the sight of the shackles dangling from Thor’s fist. He poured the liquid in the glass and used his illusion to mask the fact that he needed a straw to drink, making it look as if he was casually sipping the liquid from the glass.

“So, if I understand correctly,” Natasha spoke, “the chains seal of his magic, and if he doesn’t have his magic he can’t create an illusion on himself - or whatever it is he currently is doing - and thus can’t speak either because his lips are… sewn shut and so he can’t lie either?”

“You are quick to catch on,” Loki taunted but was ignored.

Thor nodded. “Yes, and the used wire is also infused with magic and-” Thor had to dodge as Loki hurled the glass towards his brother, shattering it against a glass window.

“Wow, wow!” Tony said shocked, trying to calm the situation as he saw the murderous look in Loki’s eyes and the anger flaring in Thor’s. “He clearly doesn’t wanna talk about that, so leave it. It doesn’t matter, just stop before the two of you tear down the place!”

Loki smoothed his face and buried the anger he was feeling. It wasn’t so much that Loki was angry with Thor, for he hadn’t done this to him and was actually indirectly also punished for Loki’s crimes because he had the custody over Loki. The bitterness Loki was feeling was because everything that happened during his trail and before they had arrived on Midgard again. It was only because Thor’s target had let them here that he was now stuck with some over-curious so-called heroes who tried to find answers to questions they shouldn’t ask.

The door opened. “She is installed and-” Steve broke mid-sentence as he saw the two Gods upon entering the room. “What is he doing here?” Steve said warily as he saw Loki who scoffed at his question.

“Where are you going?” Tony asked with a little bit of panic in his voice as he saw Loki move for the door.

“Out to explore this… home?” Loki said while eyeing the area with disdain.

“Uhm, no. You are staying here where I can see you,” Tony said belittling.

“Try and stop me,” Loki said casually and walked into the hallway.

“Jarvis, keep me informed on his movements, and seal of the lab and… Well, seal of every area where he could do harm.”

“Yes sir,” Jarvis spoke.

“And keep an eye on her as well, Jarvis,” Steve said to the AI.

 

***

 

As she fired the arrow she heard someone speak behind her, his voice dark and filled with mockery, “you are not very good at this, are you?”

She sighed. It had been quite a while since she had last shot an arrow, her life never giving her the time to practice more. Of course she had first spend hours to craft the arrows to her liking, but she was satisfied and now was finally able to practice for the first time since a year.

Because it had been a while almost all her arrows had missed the target and had ended up in the wall or in white of the paper.

She sighed and actually she did not want to answer the person who had asked the question. She set another arrow and let it fly loose, the arrow shivering in midair and missing the paper.

She heard the new arrival scoff behind her.

The third arrow she fired barely graced the paper and the man belittled her once more for her poor performance.

She slung her bow over her shoulder and walked to the wall to retrieve her arrows. She eyed the God as she walked back to her firing position.

His hair was raven black, his pale skin fair and his green eyes tried to pierce her soul under his scrutinizing glare.

She gave him a mocking smile and he raised his eyebrows at her insolence. “Do you even know who I am, cheeky girl,” he asked in that same belittling tone.

As she let another arrow fly - which missed its mark - she answered him, “yes, Loki, I know who you are.” She fully knew who he was and she also knew he could be quite mocking, arrogant and belittling, which she was currently experiencing first hand.

Another arrow missed.

“My, my. I sincerely hope this isn’t your profession in this team of so-called heroes because I wouldn't trust you to have my back,” his arrogance resonating in his voice.

The arrow flew wide at his words and landed on the floor.

She didn't answer him. She didn't want too and she needed to concentrate as she let another arrow fly, this one ending up in the black ring, the first one of many actually closing in on the bullseye.

“You missed,” Loki said stating the obvious, his voice casually but a hint of disgust intertwined in it.

Arrogant and mocking, Loki was really getting on her nerves. She had just wanted to practice after settling in the tower with the Avengers. It had taken her hours to craft the arrows, their black shafts carefully crafted with intercrate patterns, their tips shining white matching the white feathers. Just her and the bow, trying to become one with it again, yet here was the God of Lies annoying her with only his mere presence. She hadn't even introduced herself to him and he was already making her blood boil.

After two more arrows she went to retrieve them again, both shots missing and both of them getting a snippy remark from Loki.

As she was back at the line again she could feel his eyes scrutinizing her once more, his eyes probably roaming her body, in his mind ravishing it and she felt very uncomfortable. “Don’t you have somewhere else to be?” she asked him with a sigh.

“No,” he casually said and crossed his arms while leaning against the wall, still eyeing her.

Another arrow missed.

“I seriously hope your aim is better during other activities,” Loki said amused but she picked up on the suggestive tone easily. For a second her composure stiffened and she heard him snicker.

That was it! She set another arrow to her bow and she started to whisper.

“If you mutter your answer I can’t hear you,” Loki taunted.

Right before she fired her shot she turned, still whispering, and aimed for the God of Lies. She loosened and the arrow narrowingly missed his ear, cutting of a little strand of his hair that stuck on the arrow in the wall. A faint smell of rot and parchment hung in the air.

Loki’s face dropped and was soon replaced by a scowl. “You little Mortal!” he said angrily, “don’t ever do that again!”

She shrugged. “Then stop annoying me,” she casually said flashing him a smile and Loki grunted.

She shot another arrow and missed the paper again. “You know,” Loki started, “it is a good thing you are so bad at this, that arrow narrowly missed me and could have landed between my eyes.”

“If you don’t shut up the next one  _will_ land between your eyes!” she shouted angrily at him.

Loki laughed. He really  _was_ trying to get on her nerves, seeing how far he could go before she would give up her futile attempts at hitting her mark. “I do not think you are capable of that and if you’d succeed, it would be a lucky shot,” he said with a smile on his face.

She set another arrow. “No, it wouldn’t,” she fired the arrow, again in the black ring.

Loki laughed. “You are lying to yourself, little one, next time I’m going to invade this Realm, I’ll start with killing you. One less Avenger in front of my feet, easy kill. That, or I might do something else to you…” his words trailed and a wolvish grin spread across his face.

She grimaced as she remembered that faithfull day that had wrecked her life. It frightened her how casually he spoke about what he had done and seemed to have no problem at all with all the blood he had shed. Innocent blood. Blood of children, parents… Friends.

A pang of emotional hurt wrecked her and a sad look crossed her face which was soon replaced by one of anger. As she set another arrow she started to whisper again, the ancient words of a language long forgotten by mankind rolling of her tongue. She could feel the words hooking on the arrow and a scent of rotting parchment filled the air. This time she was done with Loki’s blatant words and his insinutive tone. His actions had cost her dearly and she wanted to put the God in his place once and for all, showing she was not to be messed with.

“The whispering again,” Loki laughed. “Is this something you also do wh-”

Loki never got to finish his sentence because she turned once more in his direction and set the arrow loose going straight for his head. Just before it would lodge between the God’s eyes the arrow stopped, hovering in mid air and Loki had to squint to see the arrows tip barely touching the skin right between his eyes.

Shock washed over his face and she could hear him swallow.

“You are not the only one with magic in this building, Trickster,” she sneered challenging and with a short word the tip of the arrow touched the skin on his forehead. “And I’m not sure whether or not you know who I am, or my profession, but you might want to treat me a little bit more careful,” with another word the arrow slowly inched forward, making Loki’s illusion waver and she briefly got a glimpse of the way he truly looked.

The glimpse was brief, but it was enough for her to catch on the reasons Loki was antagonizing her and she made the arrow stop. “But I very much like you to apologize for your terrible behaviour.” 

Her words were bold and once Loki had recovered from his initial surprise, he laughed. It wasn’t a mocking laugh this time, but one of genuine mirth and even a little admiration. “Asked by the vixen who is currently driving an arrow between my eyes.” He grabbed the arrow and his illusion wavered again. Quickly Loki decided not to touch the thing for he truly did not want to let his illusion fall in the presence of this meager mortal who tried to threaten him.

As if she could read his mind she spoke again, her words spitting, “and by the way, I am not Mortal!”

She muttered some words in the ancient language and the arrow floated through the air, returning to her hand as she set it on her bow to shoot again. This time she hit the bullseye and she heard Loki snicker behind her and a little smile formed on her lips at his words.

“I like her.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit slow, but we will get there!

The arrival of the Gods had stirred the residents of the Avengers tower for quite some hours, but after everything had settled they were all in the common room, the Avengers having animated conversations while Loki just sat on the stairs, listening and brooding.

“If you don’t mind me asking, milady,” Thor said to the newest female Avenger, “why did you join the Avengers?”

Thor had only been introduced to the newest Avenger mere minutes ago after Tony had installed him and Loki in the tower, giving them their own floor. Of course this had dismayed Loki who’d rather have an entire floor for himself, but no such thing was going to happen especially seeing the fact that Thor rather kept his brother close so he couldn’t misbehave.

Tony also hadn’t bothered to introduce Loki to the new lady who apparently was also part of the Avengers but he hadn’t needed an introduction for he had already met her this morning, and a sly smile played around his lips as he thought back at their first encounter.

“I’d rather not tell you with _him_ in the room,” she spoke while pointedly ignoring said subject, being Loki.

“I am right here in the room, you know, and I can hear you,” Loki said spiteful.

“You’re not deaf indeed, but keep it up and we’ll mute you again,” Tony said, drawing a snicker from Clint but earning a firm warning glare from Thor.

“Man of Iron, that is not your call to make,” he spoke balanced and then turned towards his brother. “But keep it up indeed and I might make the call, brother,” he said with a sweet smile that didn’t befit him and Loki just gave him a sour look.

Loki wondered what had happened to his brother that made him so hostile towards him. Loki knew he had done some bad things, albeit it not entirely his fault thought he never voiced that, but Thor had treated him like an enemy for the past weeks. He didn’t want to admit it, but it hurted him on some level even though he was fully aware he shouldn’t care.

He didn’t care.

The anger Thor harbored was something Loki could understand, and there was a little shard inside Loki that was also very cross with himself for his actions, but on the other hand Thor had no reason to treat him like this especially since he had no clue what had happened to Loki after he had fallen from the Bifrost.

Loki just figured at that moment his brother wasn’t (only) just mad with him, but maybe also with Odin. Thor hadn’t chosen this punishment for Loki and now he was left with picking up the broken pieces and getting custody over his little brother which he surely didn’t want to have.

The Avengers laughed and drew Loki from his complemantaitions. Apparently he had been brooding for quite some time and they were back to having fun among themselves again, completely ignoring the God of Lies.

Loki got up to leave.

“Where are you going?” Bruce asked as he eyed the God.

“To my chambers,” Loki said curtly, feeling unwanted and he’d rather be alone in his chamber with a book or something.

“But the food will soon arrive,” Tony piped in happily which drew a confused look from Loki. Did he just want to have Loki in the room, sharing a meal with them? Or was it so that the Man in Iron could keep an eye on him making sure he wouldn’t tear down the building or take over the earth or something? Loki pondered at that for a moment before tossing the first idea aside and going with the latter reason afore he answered. “And how do you suppose I’m going to eat then?” Loki said mockingly but he couldn’t keep a little bit of hurt from his voice.

Tony’s face dropped and a silence spread through the room. None of them had thought of that yet and hadn’t given it a second thought any longer since Loki had put up an illusion to hide his current state.

Bruce blinked and spoke softly, “how long has it been since you have eaten?” Tension hung thick in the room after that question and Loki cocked his head, seizing up the scientist who felt very uncomfortable under that glare. They could see his jaw tighten as Loki clenched his teeth.

Truth was, he hadn’t eaten in weeks. His last meal had been when he had been in the prisons of Asgard awaiting his trial. It hadn’t been that long because he could go a while without food, but Loki had noticed the little hints that told him he should eat something or else the lack of food would take a further toll on him.

He wanted to sigh but didn’t want to give this room full of Mortals - and Thor - the satisfaction of seeing him this hurt and thus he didn’t answer Bruce. Without sparing any of them another glare Loki swept from the room.

Or at least, they thought he did.

 

***

 

She looked around the room and smiled. She liked the Avengers.

She had only been with them for a couple of days, and hadn’t quite settled as much, but she had left her old life behind - she couldn’t go back even if she wanted to - and started to feel somewhat comfortable for the first time since days.

“Now that my brother has left the room, could you indulge me as to how you have met the team and why you are here?” Thor asked her.

She gave him a warm smile. She hadn’t met Thor but had heard much about him, and even though he didn’t show any kindness towards Loki, he surely did show kindness towards the Avengers and her, and lived up to the reputation that had been sketched out to her by the others.

“Yes,” she said and cleared her throat. “I am, or was actually, an agent working for S.H.I.E.L.D. in Project P.E.G.A.S.U.S. until your brother came along and destroyed the facility. I barely escaped getting buried beneath its surface when it collapsed and I got installed somewhere else. That was until…” she trailed of and eyed Barton, not sure whether to proceed or not.

“Until I found her while being enthralled by Loki,” Clint said deadpanned.

She nodded. “Yes. Well… One thing let to another and before I knew it I was enthralled as well, but I do not think your brother ever noticed my presence for he did not acknowledged in any form he knew me.” She sighed.

“After the invasion, and when the portal collapsed,” she nodded appreciative to Tony, “I went back to my normal self again but I didn’t get a moment of reprieve afore S.H.I.E.L.D. captured me for interrogation.”

Shock washed over Thor’s face but she made a motion with her hand suggesting he shouldn’t dwell on it too much. “They interrogated everyone they could find who was involved just to get all the information they needed,” she clarified casually.

“With the Project compromised and the Tesseract gone, there wasn’t much I could do at S.H.I.E.L.D. any longer but they knew I had some powers and thus introduced me to Steve who assessed I could make a valuable contribution to the team.” She gave the captain a smile. “And that is how I got here.”

Of course that wasn’t the entire story, it never was, but Thor and the others needn’t know that.

Thor hummed, apparently satisfied at the retelling even though he had some moments grimaced at the mentionings of Loki.

The doorbell rang and Tony flew up from his chair. “Dinner is here!” he exclaimed happily and bounded to the elevator, already expecting Jarvis having let the delivery guy in and being on his way to the floor.

What Tony didn’t noticed was that he almost brushed Loki who never had left the room but just had put up an illusion to make himself invisible, taking up residence leaning against the wall. Loki had heard the new Avenger’s entire story and tried to search his memory for ever seeing the woman before, but he couldn’t remember, some of the events that had happened still a blur in his mind.

After Tony had taken the pizza’s from the delivery guy, he bounded back towards the sitting area and put the boxes on the table. A little flash of worry crossed his face.

“Speak, Man of Iron,” Thor bode him.

“Well… shouldn’t we get your brother for dinner or something? I mean-” Tony trailed of biting his lip. He didn’t know why but he felt a pang of pity for the God of Lies.

Clint scoffed. “Did you really had to bring _him_ up? I finally had some peace. By the way, he still can’t eat, remember,” and he plucked a box from the table and pulled it open, offering a slice to the newest Avengers first. She happily took it and thanked him.

She was glad there was no friction between her and Barton for they had both been through the same and had spoken about this days ago. But she still wasn’t sure of her feelings towards the God of Lies, especially after the horrible encounter this morning. In the end she had left the shooting range for he just hadn’t want to leave.

Yet she had also seen his true state and there was more to it than Loki had let on, for she knew who he was and he must have a reason for leaving the wires in his lips. “Can’t we give him like, you know, space food or throw this in a blender or something?” she offered.

Tony gave her a disgusted look at the thought of putting perfect pizza in a blender.

“He can take them out, he just chooses not too,” Thor said casually.

She felt a little smile tug at the corner of her lips. Her assessment on the subject had been right but it didn’t lessen the slight worry she started to feel. What was he trying to hide that was not worth taking the threads out so he could speak and eat again? Or even drink without a straw for that matter!

She didn’t voice her questions out loud, but Bruce did.

Thor opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted as he tried to catch his glass that suddenly fell of the table. He sighed while eyeing the glass. “Maybe that isn’t my place to tell,” he said as a sadness washed over his face while he carefully put the glass back on the table.

“How the-” Tony started but Thor brushed it off. Thor had already suspected Loki hadn’t left the room for he knew Loki was far too curious about this new Avenger, and if the others knew of his ability to hide himself, they sure would’ve known the falling glass was an actual warning from Loki’s behalf not to speak about it.

Thor abruptly turned to her, giving her a little startle, but he smiled warmly and spoke, “what are your powers actually?” Immediately he regretted the question as it might not be wise for her to tell him with his brother in the room, but he would figure it out eventually and Thor didn’t see any necessity for her to hide it.

Before she could answer alarms sounded through the compound. “Sir,” Jarvis spoke, “there seems to be an alien attack in Washington. They are asking for your assistance.”

“Right,” Tony said jumping up. “Point Break, are you coming along?”

“I suppose I can spare some time,” Thor smiled. “Just let me get my brother.”

That draw a whine from Clint. “Does he really have to come along?”

“He is still placed under my custody and I’d rather have him close where I can keep an eye on him,” Thor said while pointitly looking in the directing where Loki had been leaning against the wall the entire evening. “And he might be able to aid us in some way.”

“Yeah, that is nice and all, but I just don’t trust him,” Barton said already by the door standing very close to Loki.

“The feeling is mutual,” Loki spoke while revealing himself and he had to dodge a kick from Clint who just lashed out because Loki had caught him unaware. When Clint finally saw what had startled him, rage burned in his eyes and he drew his arm back to punch the God, but Natasha grabbed his arm, holding him back. “Save it,” she warned the archer.

“Has he been standing there the entire time?” Bruce asked while looking at the floor.

Loki moved from his spot, not willing to antagonize the pity mortal archer who was still trying to get to him any further, and walked to his brother who was standing next to the new Avenger. “Yes,” he said while he looked her in the eye catching her hand as she tried to slap him across the face, drawing a wide grin from the God.

“Sir, there are civilians in danger,” Jarvis interjected.

“Right. Suit up!” Tony said. “We’ll meet in the helicarrier within two minutes.”

“I guess you’ll just get a demonstration of my power instead of me explaining it to you, Thor,” she said casually and pulled her wrist free from Loki’s grasp, not once breaking the stare with Loki while she had spoken.

“Can’t we just leave him in the helicarrier?” Clint asked while Natasha shoved him out of the room and telling him to suit up.

She left the room as well and Thor eyed his brother.

“What?” Loki asked while shrugging, although he was very well aware of what he had done.

Thor only sighed. Sadness crossed in his eyes but he composed himself quickly and put a stern look on his face. “Do not make me regret this decision or-”

“Yes, yes, the shackles, I am aware,” exhaustment of Thor’s threat apparent in Loki’s voice. He was fully aware of the ramifications and he needn’t be reminded every single minute as if he was some small child. “Lead the way,” he said motioning for Thor to walk them to the helicarrier, for Loki had no idea where that would be.

“Just-” Thor started.

“Behave. Yes,” Loki finished Thor’s sentence with a sigh while rolling his eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

As she entered the helicarrier she could feel the Gods instantly staring at her, and a little blush came to her cheeks.

“What _are_ your abilities?” Loki asked incredulously as he eyed her suit which was highly uncommon. With a little bit of help from Tony and some handiwork of herself she had crafted the black leather garment that fitted her like a glove. She looked down at her suit, spared Loki a glance before slinging her quiver with arrows off her shoulder and sitting across the Gods. The quiver immediately drew a smirk from Loki.

“Shut up!” she snapped at him before he could make a snippy remark and she fidgeted with a bone her suit.

The entire exterior of her suit was adorned with bones, making it look like she was wearing a skeleton on the outside. Each bone was engraved with intricate markings, some of them white with black carvings, others black with white carvings. On her belt dangling on the sides hung two swords, the blades made out of white bone, the handles blackened and both of them also entirely etched with various designs. On her thighs she supported two daggers, made in the same fashion, as were the six tiny daggers hidden on various places on her person.

“Don’t you need a bow for that?” Loki asked while nodding towards the arrows. “Not that you would hit something,” he muttered under his breath. Suddenly one of the tiny daggers she owned hovered in front of his nose, the air filling with the smell of rotten parchment.

“She is a type of witch,” Steve said while putting a hand on her shoulder and looking her pointedly in the eye. “Not an archer but a very good fighter as well.” She withdrew the dagger and put it back in its sheath.

“Not exactly a witch,” she muttered under her breath but let it go.

Loki gave her a wide grin. “And you have to look like an undead, why?” he asked trying to push her buttons.

She cringed but composed herself quickly. “You’ll see soon enough,” she said mysteriously, not wanting to satisfy the God of Lies and trying to treat very carefully around both Gods for she hadn’t told her entire story just yet.

The helicarrier had reached its destination and hovered in the air. “Sorry guys, I can’t put her down or we’ll destroy something,” Natasha said from the cockpit.

“No problem. Just open the hatch,” Tony said while he grabbed Steve by the collar. “Ready to fly, Cap?” he said and didn’t wait for an answer as he flew out of the helicarrier the moment the hatch had lowered just enough to create an opening through which he could take of.

“Go!” Natasha said to Thor. “I’ll find us a spot to land and we’ll join you soon.”

By now the new Avenger had gotten up, slung her quiver over her shoulder and stood at the opening of the helicarrier, the wind ripping through her hair. She looked over her shoulder and started to whisper, a mischievous smile on her face. Again the air filled with the smell of rotten parchment and she jumped out of the helicarrier.

Thor let out a slight yelp, grabbed Loki by the collar and dragged him to the opening of the hatch to see what happened to her. Apparently her magic had caught on the bones of her suit, the patterns seeming to dance across them, and she levitated in the air. She winked at the Gods and with a few whispers she flew off after Tony and Steve.

Loki snickered. “Little Witch.”

Before he could say more Thor spun mjolnir and took off, still holding Loki by the collar while they flew through the air. Loki trashed in his grasp, almost choking on his own attire. “Thor, you big oaf, let me go,” he screamed angrily as the hard leather of his armour bit into his neck.

“As you wish, Brother,” and Thor let go of Loki’s collar who plummeted to the ground which drew an amused smile from the new Avenger who was still hovering in the air.

Before Loki could summon his magic to catch himself, he hit the ground hard, his illusion wavering briefly. He sighed and quickly got up. It would take more than a little fall to do any damage, but he wasn’t pleased in the slightsed and gave Thor a deadly look who landed gracefully next to him. “You asked for it,” Thor deadpanned.

They didn’t have any time left to bicker because within mere seconds they were overwhelmed by aliens.

Loki just took a few steps back, seated himself atop a car and put a forcefield around himself warding off the aliens who just bounded off the shield. He really didn’t want to join the fray, not because he didn’t want to fight, - on the contrary, he itched for a good fight - but he just simply didn’t want to indulge his brother or the Avengers, so he had decided to sit this one out and observe the newest Avenger.

She was well aware of the fact that Loki was studying her, but she didn’t care nor did she have the time to care, for she vigorously fought of the aliens.

She might’ve been off her game while shooting with an bow and arrow without the aid of her magic, but she excelled at sword fighting, especially with her own two swords. Every once in awhile she magically hurled one of her daggers at an enemy, saving one of the other Avengers.

“Hey, Reindeer Games, are you going to help us or what?” Tony asked hovering in the air. “The least you could do for me giving you and Thor an entire floor in the tower is help us a little bit.”

“I’d rather not,” Loki said with a shrug.

Tony snorted before he took off, not wanting to have this argument right now.

“ _Huglausi_!” she called to him and chopped the head of an alien with her sword while plunging a dagger into the chest of the other.

“What?” Loki demanded angrily while he wondered how she was even familiar with the word.

She killed three more aliens before she answered him, being very close to the God who still sat atop of the car in his bubble. “You heard me,” she winked at him as she jumped atop the car as well and pierced an alien right in front of his eyes just for good measure. “I bet you can’t even kill one,” she smiled at him.

That ticked Loki off. He wasn’t a coward and he would show this puny Mortal who she had antagonized! He summoned his armour and once he felt the comfort of his horned helmet, he let go of his protective bubble and took up residence next to her, a mischievous grin on his face. “Loath and behold, Mortal,” he said, jumped of the car and started a killing frenzy of his own.

Within mere minutes the floor was littered with alien bodies and both of them were sprinting towards the next cluster of assailants. “I still have killed more than you,” she taunted him and used her magic to let an arrow from her quiver fly without the use of bow, the projectile burying itself in the chest of an alien and killing it instantly.

Loki laughed and leaped off into the next cluster of aliens.

Occasionally Loki spared her a glance while fighting and he couldn’t help but notice she got hit quite a few times, and some of those hits should’ve been encrippeling, but the strikes never seemed to harm her or even leave a mark.

By now they were fully fighting side by side, just dancing around each other and working in unison as if they had done nothing else their entire lives. Soon they were out of enemies and the entire attack was at an end.

Thor only raised a confused eyebrow as she and her brother returned to the helicarrier, reciting their battle and trying to outdo the other.

Tony landed behind Thor. “What is going on between those two?” he asked the God of Thunder.

“If only I knew, Man of Iron,” he sighed still eyeing them while she gave Loki a friendly punch on the shoulder.

“If only I knew.”

 

***

 

It hadn’t taken long before Loki was back to his annoying self, the friendliness towards her deprived completely and he was set out to antagonize her once more.

She just plainly ignored him, as did the others, while they sat in the common room, eating and relaxing after the battle. Loki just stood of to the side, not wanting to go near them if he didn’t have to.

“You know what,” Tony chimed in, “we should get you an Avengers name.”

She almost choked on her drink and coughed at the liquid caught in her throat. “A what?” she asked.

“You know, a nickname, like we all have,” Clint grinned.

She slowly nodded, liking the idea. “Okay, like what?”

“Vixen,” Loki offered with a nasty smile.

She raised an eyebrow at him but let the remark slip.

“Uhm, Bone Witch?” Bruce asked which drew weird faces from all of them.

“That is just vulgar and stupid,” Natasha said casually.

“And I’m not a witch,” she said sourly.

“Spirit Sentinel?” Steve said but furrowed his brow. “No, you are not guarding anything, so that will not work either.”

“Something with death seeing you can magick bones and stuff,” Tony said while tapping his finger to his lips and she cringed. “Death, mort, mortis…” he trailed.

“Yes, I know. Here is the scary Voodoo Priestess.” She rolled her eyes. “Could we leave out any form of death, being it English, Latin or any other language,” she said curtly.

“If you don’t hone your fighting skills a little more you’ll soon _be_ Mortis,” Loki muttered.

At that she shot up from her chair and closed the distance between her and Loki with a few quick strides, fire in her eyes. Loki only looked at her amused, a sly smile around his lips. Sometimes he just loved the attention, whether it be positive or negative, and he had quickly figured that he liked any form of attention coming from her. “Oh no,” he whined mocking, “what is the Mortal going to do to me?” and a wolvish grin spread across his face.

She uttered a few quick words, while grabbing something from her pocket before grabbing Loki by the throat and shoving him against the glass window. He still grinned but the grin evaporated quickly as his illusion fell and showed his true state of well-being, or actually, the lack thereof.

The crude stitches still sealed his lips, the black thread an angry contrast to his pale skin. His eyes were sunken deep within their sockets and they lacked the green spark they normally held. But the most noticeable thing, and what actually shocked them most, was the fact that he actually looked very thin, his skin tightly wrapped around his bones, the lack of food quite apparent.

She bared her teeth at him and Loki swallowed.

She brought her face next to his ear, “now listen and listen very well,” she whispered. “You stop annoying me or I’ll break your pretty illusion for quite some time.”

Loki made a sound in the back of his throat.

She continued, “and if that doesn’t work I’ll just rip those threads out of your mouth and we’ll see how things go from there.” With a warning glare she gave him a little push and let him go.

Anger burned in Loki’s eyes but he didn’t dare to make a move against her, her threat loud and clear. Quickly he tried to compose himself and crafted his illusion back into place, not wanting to show how haughty he looked longer than necessary.

She walked back to the couch and flopped herself next to Steve the anger gone and a smile on her face. “Kalypso,” she said.

It took some time before the Avengers tore their eyes away from Loki who was now looking at the floor while fidgeting with his hands.

“What?” Thor asked her confused.

“Kalypso. My nickname. Call me Kalypso,” she grinned.

“You mean like the greek Goddess?” Natasha said pensive.

She snorted. “No, because I mostly resemble a voodoo priestess.”

“Ah, like the Goddess from Pirates of the Caribbean,” Clint offered.

“Exactly!”

Natasha blinked and then shrugged. “Kalypso it is!”

 

***

 

Loki had quickly left the common room when Bruce had brought up Loki’s haughty appearance. The man was set upon trying to feed him or take out the stitches and Loki had had enough of his idiotic attempts to care for him.

He wasn’t even sure why the scientist was so much set out in trying to help him, for the last encounter he had had with the man he had been smacked to the ground by the monster dwelling inside the scientist.

Loki shuddered at the thought and the shivers were for more than one reason.

It was currently deep in the night and Loki sneaked through the tower. Eventually during his solitary confinement in his chambers he had admitted to himself that he needed to eat something, or soon his magic would start to falter, and by the Norns he couldn’t have that around ‘Kalypso’, as she was referred to by now.

He walked into the kitchen and started to rummage through the cabinets, looking for something he could get past his lips and teeth.

“Sir, are you looking for something special?” Jarvis suddenly spoke and Loki jumped at the unexpected voice of the AI.

Loki summoned some of his magic to create only a part of his illusions which he used to speak. He had figured that at this hour the Avengers would be asleep and there was no need for his illusion.

“I-” he spoke but was broken off by the door to the kitchen that opened. Quickly he expanded his illusion to fully cover himself just in time before she walked in.

She walked to him and involuntary Loki took a step backwards. She snickered while she pulled open a cabinet.

Loki wanted to make some form of snippy comment but was just in time to keep his tongue behind his teeth, not wanting to lose his illusion once again.

She pulled a silver satchel with the Stark logo out of the cabinet, opened it and poured its weird liquid contents in a glass. “What is that?” Loki asked disgusted.

“This? This is what they refer to as space-food. It is a liquid form of food with all the nutrients but no need to chew.” She looked at the contents. “It looks far more disgusting than it actually is and it good for a quick meal.” She pulled a straw from another cabinet, winked at Loki and left the kitchen.

He looked after her and then to the cabinet from which she had pulled the silver satchel. Doubt crossed Loki’s mind, a list of pro’s and con’s quickly forming in his head. The solely and only reason he didn’t actually want to try the stuff was because it would mar his pride, but the hunger won out and thus he gave in, mimicking her actions.

She was right, it didn’t taste horrible and he could feel the gratitude coming from his stomach.

As he devoured the first batch, Loki was unaware of her standing by the door. She was glad she could somewhat trick the trickster, for Bruce’s attempts to get something to eat into Loki surely would’ve failed. She was also glad she didn’t have to take him out and put him in the treatment facility and hook him on a machine to feed him, because she would’ve only given it another week or two or that would have become the case.

She spared Loki one last glance and left for her chamber, a small smile on her lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thrive on comments <3  
> 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little bit longer than the other, but I’m sure you don’t mind.

Loki wandered through the tower as he heard battle-screams coming from the training room. A mixture of boredom and curiosity got hold of him and he wandered into the room, making sure to stay to the sides as not to intervene with the training program.

A little smile formed on his lips as he saw her bounce and leap past different animated enemies, her two swords in hand and cleanly cutting through the enemies.

It took some time for her to notice she had a spectator. “What do you want, Loki?” she asked as she leaped from a rock while skewering an enemy, pushing a strand of hair out of her face.

“Nothing. I’m just merily enjoying the view,” he snickered.

She scoffed. “Of course. After me beating you yesterday all you can do is watch to nourish your wounded ego.” She turned her sword and without looking over her shoulder she skewered another enemy, a sly smile on her lips.

Loki scowled. “Had it been only a fight between you and me, I would have killed you,” he spat, the arrogance dripping in his tone.

“Sure you would,” she sad sweet and took down another enemy before stopping the program.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Loki demanded. Suddenly he didn’t like her very much and the desire to plunge one of his daggers through her heart overwhelmed him.

“It means you can’t defeat me,” she casually offered and threw him a taunting wink for good measure. She had seen the God of Lies fight, and even though she had to admit he was good, she had a few tricks up her sleeve. Not that she wanted to show them yet, but she drew great satisfaction from toying with him because he knew she could strip him of his illusions within seconds if she wanted so.

It wasn’t as much she stripped the illusion away, and it was no easy feat for she had to react and handle quickly, but the effect was the same. And for the sole purpose of Loki lingering in the tower she had put carved bones in each pocket of every jeans and some of her sweaters too, just in case she needed one quickly.

Not only did she speak an ancient language, it was also one of the sources of her magic, and with the carved bones and the dead language, she could manipulate certain amounts of energy to neutralize his illusions.

It was nothing more than a really good magic trick, for there was far more to her than anyone had ever seen from her, but nobody needed to know that and she was sure the God of Trickery could appreciate a good jest.

Loki intercepted her by placing himself in front of her, a confident look in his eyes and his face set stern. “Let’s test that, shall we?” he threatened and summoned a dagger.

“I do not need to prove myself to you, Trickster,” and she brushed past him walking to the bottle of water that was standing on a bench to the side.

Before she could grab the bottle something whisked past her ear and a dagger stood quivering in the wall, a strand of her hair hanging from it. She grabbed the bottle of water and turned with a smile on her face.

“Next on will be between your eyes,” Loki said mockingly which he accompanied with the tiniest of bows.

She sighed, took a swig from the bottle of water and put it away again afore she grabbed her twin swords and took up a stance. “Your funeral,” she deadpanned and lunged for him.

Loki was quick on his feet and dodged her blows. He trusted some feints at her but she deflected them and even Loki’s true intended strike missed its mark. She indeed was good with those swords, Loki had to admit, but he was sure she couldn’t defeat him. He was a trained warrior, as Prince trained by Asgard’s finest and skilled through many battles. For now he wanted to refrain from using magic and just see how this played out. A mischievous smile formed on his lips as he attacked her once more.

They fought while covering every inch of space in the training room, both of them leaping and bounding of walls trying to hit the other, but they matched each other and neither of them hit home.

They hadn’t noticed they had drew in a spectator and Natasha stood leaning against the wall looking at them in amusement.

But soon the lack of food started to catch up with Loki and he decided he was done with her. He could no longer afford to waste any more energy on her but he didn’t want to yield either, not willing to give her the satisfaction.

Quickly he summoned multiple illusions of himself which filled the room and his true self scurried of to the side. She suddenly stopped dead in her tracks and closed her eyes. Loki hadn’t expected that but he didn’t want to give her time to call for her magic and he quickly threw a dagger. She deflected it harmlessly using her hearing only to search his real whereabouts, but the second dagger followed rapidly and clipped of her chest.

Loki started to laugh in triumph but once he saw his dagger had done her no harm he became furious. “You little _Kerling_. You can not even fight a fair fight without the aid of your magic, can you now?” and he made his illusions disappear.

“Neither can you, Loki,” Natasha offered from the side and both fighters turned their head at the assassin.

“I am the God of Deceit and therefore allowed to do so,” he snapped, his pride really wounded for the Black Widow was right. Hadn’t he been so exhausted he would’ve been able to keep up the fight for hours, something he was sure of she could not, but he needed the reprieve.

“I did not use my magic for if I would have, the air would be drenched with the smell of rot right now,” and she walked to the side to drink some more water.

Loki didn’t want to admit it, but she had a valid point. “My dagger hit you perfectly in the chest and it should be protruding from your chest right now. You did something to prevent that.”

She shrugged. “And what if I did? Would it matter? I think you should be glad that the dagger currently isn’t lodged in my heart for I am quite sure your brother would be right here right now dragging you away in the chains that seal off your magic,” she reminded him.

Loki took a step back at her assessment, which was right, and sputtered. The exhaustion nagged at him and he wasn’t able to get the words past his illusions lips and just forfeited the attempt.

With some longing he briefly eyed at the bottle of water in her hands and she caught his look. With an amused smile she tossed the bottle at him which he deftly caught and she spoke to Natasha. “Shall we?” she invited the Widow and walked to the middle of the training room.

“Thank you Loki, that was a fine warming-up,” she flashed a smile at him and deflected a blow from the naginata the Widow - who had wasted no time to attack her - handled. This time Kalypso choose her daggers and before Loki was even aware the ladies were tumbling through the room trading thrusts in the same manner as she and Loki had done.

Loki tried to calm his anger and looked at the bottle in his hands. With a grimace he put it down on the bench on which he took up residence to study the woman further. He was sure his aim had been perfect and his dagger had hit its mark. Yet he couldn’t phantom why she wasn’t harmed and she had indeed not used magic or the characteristic smell of her magic would still be lingering in the air.

Apparently she didn’t handle her daggers as deftly as she handled her swords, and a couple of times Natasha almost bested her, even once clipping her shoulder. She didn’t seem to winch at it and just fought on until the Widow cut her across the calf in a low thrust and she stumbled to her knees, Natasha hovering over her with the tip of the naginata aimed for her throat. She snickered and nodded, a clear sign to the other woman she yielded.

A puzzled look crossed Loki’s face. How was it possible that a tiny scratch like that brought her to her knees while his dagger couldn’t even mar her skin? The anger he had so carefully tried to control just washed over him like a tidal wave, he jumped from the bench and walked threateningly towards her. “What trick is this you are playing?” he said between gritted teeth.

Innocently she looked up at him but offered him no answer other than a small smile.

This time Natasha pipped in, “yes, how is it possible? Because you haven’t told me either.”

She just looked up at the two people hovering over her and shrugged. “Loki is just bad at fighting,” she taunted and tried to rise to her feet. Loki aided her in that but not in the way she would have wanted because he hoisted her up by the collar of her shirt, putting his face close to hers. Within seconds he summoned his dagger and held the blade against her cheek while he tried to bury the tip in her skin. But try all he might, her skin would not break under sharpness of his blade.

Loki scowled and without thinking he grabbed the naginata from Natasha’s hands. It must have to do something with his weapons, for they are riddled with the same magic he uses, which she can neutralize, but the naginata the Widow handled was not.

Loki threw her to the floor and she landed hard on her back, not having expected the sudden assault. With one hand Loki fended off Natasha’s attempts to grab the weapon in his hands, which she quickly realised was futile, and she changed her attacks to trying to punch him in order for the God to stop his assault.

But Loki was taken by a rage he hadn’t felt in a long time, which aided him but also blurred his rational thinking, and he kept the assassin at bay with ease. He looked down upon the woman lying on the floor and without a second thought he plunged the naginata in her shoulder which once again didn’t harm her.

Quickly she grabbed the blade of the naginata, not even drawing blood from her hands which it surely should have, and twisted it, prying it from Loki’s grasp and tossing it aside. She rolled over and scrambled to her feet while she fetched a bone from her pocket.

Soon the room was filled with the stench of rotten parchment and she had Loki pinned beneath her, his illusion gone and his exhausted body no longer a match for her or her magic.

The door opened and she greeted the newcomer happily. “Thor!”

And Loki heard the rattling of chains.

 

***

 

“Are you even listening to what I am saying?” Thor asked Loki agitated.

Loki sat on the edge of Thor's bed, his wrists once more in chains and a pouting look on his face making him look childish. But he wasn't pouting because of Thor or the chains, nor the fact that Thor was very cross with him. No, loki was angry with himself for so blatantly having lost control and allowing the vixen to get under his skin so much.

Loki eyed his brother with boredom and shrugged, showing his disinterest. Thor had been talking to him for some time, berating him and trying to call him out on his behaviour, but Loki couldn’t care less.

“Why did you attack her?” Thor spoke, drawing Loki from his contemplations. He gave his brother a quizzical look and raised both his eyebrows. If thor expected an answer he should unshackle him, until then he wouldn’t, and couldn’t, say a word.

But the question pounded in Loki’s head because he didn't understand why he had attacked her and he didn't understand what drew him so much to her. It wasn't lust, for he was very familiar with that feeling, well… Maybe a little bit, but nothing he couldn't control. Nor was it love because love wouldn't make you want to murder someone and, though it hadn't happened often in his short life and had it been briefly, he had loved and this was nothing like it.

Maybe it had been curiosity, for it remained an enigma why she couldn’t get hurt yet Natasha had made her bleed. Maybe it was her magic or something else that lingered around her, Loki didn’t know. And it frustrated him he couldn't grasp why or what he felt for this woman and what had triggered him to so fully lose control and lose his ability to think rationally, but he didn't like it.

“Well?” Thor asked, one eyebrow raised and his arms crossed.

Loki shot an incredulous glare at Thor’s and rattled his chains while making some guttural sound in the back of his throat.

“No, if you want to speak than do so without the aid of your magic. And yes, I am fully aware you have to take out the threads first, but that is the sacrifice you will have to make!” Thor almost shouted at him, their faces close and the air grewing static with electricity.

Thor withdrew and clasped his hands behind his back, a sadness washing over his face. “What happened to you brother?” he muttered under his breath while turning away from Loki, not wanting to look at him for it currently only evoked anger in him.

Loki’s face contorted. What had happened to him? _If only you'd knew, you big oaf!_ He thought, angry bile rising in the back of his throat.

But of course Thor didn't know. Nobody knew for nobody had taken the time, not even asked, what had happened to him. And if they had spoken about it, whether it had been near him or not, nobody had spoken so with any seriousness and Loki hadn’t been willing to talk about it when all they did was joke at his expanse.

Nobody had once genuine showed interest in his story, his reasons or his perspective, because his reputation already proceeded him and they expected he’d wage nothing else but lies.

The All-father wouldn’t understand nor had Loki been very much inclined to elaborate any of his actions and he had just settled for mouthing of to the All-father during his trail. It had driven Odin to a point where he had decided he was done with Loki’s Silver Tongue and had opted for a longer lasting, and even more so effective, solution over the Midgardian muzzle.

Although Loki loathed to admit it, it had hurted him that nobody had shown any form of interest, but he was past that hurt now and only indifference remained. When someone finally came to ask, when his mother had finally found her way to speak to him, it already had been too late, the wires preventing him from being able to share the words and the chains rendering him mute.

Loki was angry, very angry that it had taken her so long to seek him out and he only had looked at her with no emotion in his eyes and had turned away from her. It had been to late, she was too late. Nobody understood and nobody would ever understand for his willingness to share had evaporated the moment they had pinned him down on a table, strong seidr keeping him in place, and had pulled the magical thread through his flesh with a crude needle.

Oh, how he wanted to scream. How he had wanted to scream at that moment, but he could not. Not then and not now for the consequences were something he wasn’t ready to bear yet.

Yet when he thought of Frigga guilt raked his heart and he felt a sadness wash over him.

Thor turned to him and looked into Loki’s hollow eyes. He felt a pang of heartache for it pained him to see his little brother so. Yet there was also a small feeling of retaliation lingering within Thor for Loki had brought this down on himself and had dragged him along with it.

It wasn’t Loki’s fault he had the custody over him but Thor just wished Loki would put aside his arrogance and talk to him. But when he looked in those green eyes the idea sparked within him that maybe it wasn’t arrogance that prevented Loki from taking out the wires, or pride for that matter. No, Thor saw a little bit of fear cross in those eyes and he felt regret for his outburst moments ago.

Loki just stared at him, a defiant look on his face. He knew Loki wasn’t going to provide him with an answer and Thor didn’t have the answer so he only sighed. Was he ever going to get through to his brother? Was Thor ever going to understand him? Was Loki ever going to understand _him_? He didn’t knew but he surely hoped so.

Thor tore his eyes from Loki’s and looked at his emaciated form and pursed his lips together. “Come,” Thor said as he walked to the door.

Loki looked at him questioningly, then to the door, to his shackles and back to Thor. Loki would rather stay in this room, or his own preferably, instead of going anywhere else.

“I’m not going to take them off,” Thor said and gripped Loki’s shoulder and started shoving him to the door. “I’m not going to let you out of my sight either,” he stated bluntly as Loki tried to shrug him off while opening the door, dragging Loki - who currently was no match for his brother - with him.


	5. Chapter 5

They were all sitting in the common room, laughing and eating, except for Loki who had been chained up to the railing of the stairs so he couldn’t get away or leave Thor’s sight.

Loki just sat there, eyeing them all with disdain while he actually should feel humiliated but he didn’t. There was nothing he could do, nor did he have the energy, and thus he didn’t care and had settled for shooting Thor and the others deadly glares.

Loki sighed and almost smiled at the irony but eventually just looked down while fidgeting with his hands. Suddenly someone was standing in front of him and a glass with the weird space-food and a straw in it dangled in front of his nose. He looked up at the person holding the glass. Her!

If looks could kill she surely would be dead by now. Loki didn’t take the glass, partly because he couldn’t reach that far and partly because he didn’t need her pity or help.

She put the glass down next to him and gave him a wink before walking away. Loki stared at the glass and suddenly felt people were staring at him and the moment he looked up every occupant of the room just quickly looked away, looking as if they were busying themselves with something else.

He was so terribly done with them and he was very sure the feeling was mutual.

“Can’t we-” Tony started while stealing a glance at Loki. “Can we just unchain him?” he asked carefully. “I mean, it really makes me uncomfortable.”

“Bad guy,” Clint interjected casually and took another bite of his food.

“Well, bad guy or not, this is not how we should treat people,” Steve said a little bit sour and Bruce and Natasha nodded their agreement.

“He just looks… haughty,” Tony mumbled while looking at the floor. “Make no mistake, I’m not fond of him but I don’t think he deserves this either,” he spoke up with more confidence. Steve, Bruce and Natasha nodded their agreement again but Clint just snorted.

“Better leave him there,” Barton muttered under his breath, very well aware of the deadly glares Loki shot him.

“What do you say, milady?” Thor asked her. “It was you who he tried to harm.”

She laughed. “He can not harm me even if he wishes with all his might or tried to bring down a mountain upon me.”

That drew a snort from Loki who smiled amused.

Thor gave her a confused look but she only smiled at him, knowing something he, and the other Avengers for that matter, did not. She raised from her seat and walked to Loki, a bone in her hand and a whisper on her tongue while the air filled with the smell of rotten parchment.

Loki cringed at her advance towards him. It wasn’t fear that made him try to avoid her touch but the fact that he just really wanted to be left alone. But seeing no such thing would happen soon, he opted with fighting her off.

Loki tried to kick out at her to keep her at bay, knocking over the glass next to him as he did, but she deflected the blow, pinned his leg down with her foot and put just enough force in it to make him feel uncomfortable and he forfeit his attempts at putting up some form of a fight.

She leaned over him, reached out her hand and Loki just stared her down with a raging defiance in his eyes.

She could feel her magic wrap around the God and a small smile formed on her lips as he suddenly caught on to what she had done, his illusion once again in place so he could speak.

His eyes a little wider, but no less defiant, he spoke venomously. “You wanted to test that theory of your mountain? Or was once S.H.I.E.L.D. facility enough for you?”

She hissed at his words for they surely tore open old wounds and before Loki was fully aware she had her nail hooked behind his stitches, letting go of the illusion and pulling him closer to her. “I actually wanted to give you a chance to apologize for your actions but seeing you keep throwing a tantrum like a small child, I might forfeit the idea.” Her eyes grew darker as she spoke and ever so slightly pulled the threat a little harder. Loki moved with he pull and their noses touched while she still hovered over his form.

For a moment their eyes locked, a unspoken battle erupting between them and she could see a small smile tug at the corner of his mouth which ever so slightly she returned.

Still keeping hold of the thread with her nail she crouched down, releasing the strain on her back and not once breaking eye contact.

“You know, Loki. Your actions have costed me dearly. Not only did you try to take over the earth, stole the subject I was studying, tried to bring down a building on my head and enthralled me,” for a brief moment she saw his eyes narrow. “But you also took the life of a dear friend of mine.” She sighed, a brief moment of sadness crossing her face. “You took everything from me, yet here I am _not_ threatening you on a hourly basis and all I currently ask in return is if you could do the same.” She let go of the wire and pulled back slightly, searching his face. She could see him swallow but the hard look in his eyes remained. “Even if it is only for one evening,” she asked. “After that I’ll gladly kick your ass again.”

Loki held his cold stare for a couple of seconds before his demeanor broke into a smirk and he made a sound of amusement in the back of his throat. Then he put up the sweetest smile he could muster and just blinked at her.

She got up and addressed Thor. “You can take the chains off,” she casually offered while still looking down upon Loki.

“Are you sure? He hasn’t even apologized!” Tony exclaimed incredulous.

She laughed. “I rendered him unable to say so with words, and he would never apologize. Far to proud for that but I saw enough.”

Thor had gotten up by now and released Loki’s shackles who still looked at the woman with a wolvish grin. As soon as he felt his magic return he put up an illusion again and spoke, his words aimed for her, “I would never.”

She hummed and started for the couch before she turned and pointed at the stairs where the fallen glass and spilled space-food still lay. “Clean that would you?”

Loki raised an eyebrow at her, flicked his wrist and with a green flash of magic it was gone.

Natasha, Clint, Steve and Bruce just exchanged glances, not understanding what was happening and not wanting to understand either.

She plopped down in the couch and gestured for Loki to come sit next to her, which he - to everyone’s surprise - did.

Tony opened his mouth but Thor beat him to it. “I don’t know, Man of Iron.”

“And don’t ask,” Loki offered with a warning glare, but this time his glare was much less threatening and way more playful than they had seen thus far from the God of Mischief since their arrival.

Loki stole a sideway glance at the woman and snickered under his breath for he briefly caught on for his feelings towards her.

Not love. But definitely lust.

 

***

 

For the past hour they had been in the common room, chatting, laughing and sharing some stories. Even Loki was participating on his own brisk way and he had to admit he somewhat enjoyed himself. But he was also very aware he still was in the lion’s den for more than once they made a jest on his behalf.

“So, Thor. You actually never shared that mission of yours. Care to enlighten us?” Steve asked out of the blue.

“Yes, we might be able to help you,” Tony said a little too happy.

“I suppose,” Thor said with a smile. “No harm in that.”

“Are you sure of that, brother?” Loki sneered at him.

“I am, and it isn’t your decision to make.”

“I don't even _want_ to make that decision. I’m only wondering if it is wise,” Loki shrugged.

“Well, we took your ass down, so this should be easy,” Clint snapped at Loki.

“You are too kind,” Loki shot back with a disarming smile.

“Just be glad they allow you to stay in the room,” Bruce said, but there was no malice in his voice whatsoever, just a plain observation.

Loki raised an eyebrow at that. “I’ll be glad to leave if you want me too,” he countered casually. “However, I have to admit, even I don’t know what we are chasing and I am curious as well.”

“He hasn’t told you?” Steve asked.

Loki snorted, a bored look on his face. “There wasn’t any time nor did we were on… speaking terms.” He grinned. “Do share, brother,” he said with a sweet but obvious mocking tone.

The Priestess, who sat next to him, prodded him in the ribs with her elbow, drawing a low discomfortable grunt from him, but Loki left it with that and only eyed her curious before the wolvish grin was back on his face.

“I am set out to find a Draugr,” Thor said as if that would explain everything. To Loki it did, the others just stayed silent except the woman next to him who choked on her drink and couched.

“You know what he is talking about?” Tony asked her and she nodded.

“How do you know what a Draugr is?” Loki asked with a little suspicion in his voice.

“I read, you know,” she quipped, but her voice was a little higher than she had anticipated and coughed some more to hide her discomfort under the scrutinizing glare of the two Gods.

“Care to elaborate?” Natasha asked Thor.

“Well, what more do you want me to tell you, lady Romanoff? I have to find it and bring it back to Asgard.”

“That much was obvious Point Break, but that was not what she meant. What _is_ a Daugoar?”

“Draugr,” Loki corrected dryly.

“Whatever.”

“A Draugr is a type of undead. They dwell near the graves of deceased, being it their own or someone else’s, guarding the treasures within those graves. They are most known for their ability to expand in size, but there are different types of Draugr ranging from very stupid to almost lich-like.” Everyone looked at her with wide eyes and even Loki had furrowed his brows. Suddenly very aware of everyone staring at her, she felt her cheeks redden. “Like I said, I read, I am not mortal and I wield ancient magic. I know a thing or two.”

“If you are not Mortal, than what are you?” Clint asked while chewing on a toothpick.

She briefly cringed at his words but spoke quickly, “I am Aesir, just like these two,” and she thumbed the Gods with both hands.

Loki recoiled at that and along with his brother just stared at her dumbfounded.

“You hadn’t figured by now?” she asked them incredulous, looking from the one God to the other.

“I am sorry, milady. But seeing we’ve been quite… preoccupied,” Thor spoke while eyeing Loki, “I hadn’t had the time to take notice.”

“So, you are a God as well?” Natasha asked.

She snickered. “Not every Aesir is a God, you know,” she smiled.

“No, but it does explain some things,” Loki muttered under his breath.

“Wouldn’t you know,” she countered.

“And how does one find and kill a Draugr?” Steve asked while tapping his lip.

This time it was Loki who answered. “It depends on the type. Like said, most Draugr dwell near graves but this one apparently doesn’t for we have to find it, which means it is the lich-type and therefore you have to find its phylactery in order to destroy it.”

She and Thor both nodded.

“...or to control it,” Loki added considering the possibilities, his mind already thinking of a possible ten ways to use this to his advantage.

“English please,” Clint demanded while eyeing the Aesir, expecting an answer from them, but to his surprise it was Bruce who provided the answer. “A phylactery is an object in which a lich stores it soul and this keeps the lich alive and gives it the ability to regenerate, even if it was slain.”

This time they all stared at him dumbfounded. “Seven PHD’s and I might have once played Dungeon and Dragons,” he shrugged with a smile while his eyes lingered to Kalypso.

She nodded. “But where could the phylactery be?”

“Father has it.” The casual way in which Thor elaborated send shivers down her spine.

“But he who has the object controls the Draugr. Then why are you hunting it?” The look on her face had turned a little sour, some unplaceable worry shining through.

“That is correct, if the Draugr was on Asgard. But since it is not, father can not control it and thus shall I find the monster.”

Both Loki and Kalypso cringed at his words for the briefest of moments and looked at each other, some weird spark dancing between them.

“How can we locate it then?” Bruce mused. “I mean, normally one would use the magic within the phylactery to locate the Draugr. You don’t have it with you, do you?” Bruce’s eyes widened and a tangible tension rose from the Aesir on the couch which only dimmed when Thor shook his head. “Too bad,” Bruce muttered.

Loki let out a sigh he didn’t knew he had been helding and it appeared the woman next to him did the same. This sparked his curiosity. Why would she be so afraid of a Draugr or the phylactery being here? Was it something she also wanted to own, just like him? Loki could see the reason in that with her powers to control bones with spells, but what would she do with it?

Clint’s exaggerated yawn pulled Loki from his musings. “Well, this controlling undead is nice and all, but I’m tired,” Clint stretched and got up. “And I think I have been long enough in the company of a certain enslaver, so I’m off.” With a last hateful look towards Loki, Clint got briskly walked out of the room.

Loki only raised an eyebrow figuring he wasn’t worth a snippy comment and settled for staring out of the window.

“Yeah, I’m off too,” Tony said and left the room as well, followed by a muttering and rustle that was lost to Loki. Following the many questions regarding the woman, his thoughts went like a maelstrom and he rapidly skidded from one possibility to the next. When he focused again he noticed that almost everyone had left the room and that he was left with Kalypso and his brother. He sighed at the prospect of Thor ushering him towards his chambers soon, something he didn’t want because he wanted to talk to her.

Apparently she picked up on his thoughts, or maybe she wanted to be alone with Loki, because she addressed his brother. “Thor, if you want you can go to bed too. I can handle myself.” The Priestess nodded to Loki, “and him.”

Loki coughed at that but a small smile found its way to his lips. “Sure.”

“Milady, I don’t want to place my burden upon your shoulders-”

“So, I’m a burden now,” Loki spat venomously. “I don’t recall signing up for this either and-” Loki’s words were interrupted as the smell of rotten parchment filled his nostrils and a hand gently touching his arm.

“Thank you for your worries Thor, but like I said, I can handle this.” She smiled warmly at Thor who inclined his head.

Loki threw her a spiteful look which she returned with a wink.

“Thank you.” Thor got up and walked to the door. He threw Loki one last look, wanting to say something, but refrained from it.

With a sigh and a slight shake of his head, he left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thrive on comments <3  
> 


	6. Chapter 6

“Did you really need to interrupt me?” Loki asked her a little venomous when she let go of his arm which left a prickling sensation behind.

“Your rant would have had the opposite effect on Thor and you wouldn’t be here alone with me now” she chuckled.

Loki snorted yet he couldn’t deny he liked that cuckle of hers. He looked at her, his eyes narrowing and he seemed to think of something.

“Spill it,” she demanded.

This time Loki chuckled. “So dominant,” he muttered with a smirk on his face. She only arched her eyebrow and Loki dropped the smirk and gave her a serious look. “You seem… agitated. Why?”

“What do you mean?”

“This talking about Draugr and phylacteries- That!,” Loki gestured as she cringed briefly. “That exact reaction. What is it you fear about them?”

She gave him a confused look but he shot her a glare that he _knew_ she was faking her confusement, and thus she dropped the act.

“Why would you care?” she asked with a small voice while fidgeting with the hem of her shirt.

“Not necessarily care but merely an interest. You...” Loki looked her up and down and the smirk was back on his face. “You fascinate me, I wish to know more.” Suddenly he felt a heat rising within himself as she eyed him carefully.

“Is that so?” she said brashly but the shimmer in her eyes betrayed her. “Why?”

“No, no, little Voodoo Priestess, you avoid my question. Don’t you think you can use my trademark against me.” He leaned closer to her, a small hint of a threat mingled with playfulness glistening in his eyes. “Answer my question and I will answer yours.”

Her breath stoked in her throat. He was closer than she was comfortable with but she didn’t push him away. She hated to admit, but the fascination was mutual and a small smile played around her lips, the shimmer in her eyes not leaving. “I-” she sighed, trying to find the balance in herself again she had momentarily lost because he was so close to her. “I’ve had my fair share with many undead. As one to wield ancient magic for which I use bones, it isn’t avoidable to encounter them at least once in your life. In one of those encounters something I cared very dearly for was taken from me and therefore I truly do not like the subject and do I think it is almost ironic your brother has a quest that ruffles my feathers on the matter.” She swallowed hard, the memory gracing her mind’s eye and scratching at sore wounds, things she’d rather leave in the past. She looked up and wistfully smiled at Loki. “Your turn!” she pushed the wry smile from her face and turned it into a mischievous one.

Loki nodded absently, not pressing her matter any further because his memories and thoughts already started to mill on his own past. “My turn for what?” he asked distracted, not able to keep the thoughts and memories at bay.

She slapped him out of his stupor. It wasn’t hard but just enough to draw a sassy glare from him which remained on his face. He eyed her appreciatively and leaned forward to whisper in her ear, his lips ghosting her earshell. “I am fascinated by you because you do not scare easy. You seem to be the first one not to shy away from me or be cross with me. You don’t treat me like a wounded animal like the others do and on top of that I’m very curious about your magic.” He pulled back a little bit and licked his lips.

His words had send shudders down her spine and for a moment she was captivated by his tongue.

She leaned closer to him, their lips almost brushing. “Well, yes, someone has to put you in your place and Thor is a sweetheart, but he doesn’t seem to understand and thus is not able to do it properly.”

Loki pulled back, a deadly glare in his eyes which drew a wide smile from her. “And for my magic, well, I can do so much more than what you’ve seen thus far.”

Something in her words had hit the wrong cord within Loki, the mood spoiled he gave her a dark look. “Show me.”

She barked a laugh. “Darling, you’re already on starvation, don’t make me to deprive you of sleep as well for a mere demonstration.”

Loki’s dark demeanor intensified and he muttered something under his breath she couldn’t hear. Suddenly there was tension between them and his tone went cold, “I don’t see how you can harm me any further in that regard,” and his gaze drifted off to the windows staring out into the night.

“No, you probably wouldn’t see, but I hear your screams at night.”

Loki snapped his head in her direction.

“I hear your screams before I feel your illusions fall, not able to hold on to them when the nightmares threaten to swallow you.” The tension almost became tangible as a matching darkness radiated from her as well and she etched closer to him. Warily he eyed her advance towards him and he could feel the warm skin of her jawline touch his jaw as she spoke, her breath hot in his ear. “And I can make them so much worse.”

Her words were smooth but Loki didn’t miss the underlying meaning beneath them. Suddenly the heat in his veins was back and he turned his head so he could see her face, a measuring look on his face. With his face close to hers he spoke in the same silky smooth voice but the underlying anger shimmered through, “is that a threat?”

“It ain’t a promise either,” she countered while she locked him in a stare. Annoyance washed over him at her blatant words and her futile threat against him! He, God of Mischief and a Prince for that matter! From his perevial vision Loki could see her biting her lip and pangs of desire ran through his body. Lust and expiration warred within him and neither would yield, leaving him in a turmoil of feelings, not able to choose with which one he should go.

Instead he kept her stare and only narrowed his eyes. He could see that she meant her words and he was positive she would be able to carry through with her threat when push came to show. He could feel the goosebumps prick on the back of his neck and he decided she was a force to be reckoned with. For now!

But it was something he could deal with later, for his body had made the decision, and he closed the distance between their face, still holding her stare and touched her lips ever so slightly with his.

Suddenly she drew back leaving him hanging mid air, a tingling feeling of their brief touch on his lips and hers as well. “But that would spoil a lovely evening, wouldn’t it?” she asked innocently and grinned.

Loki carefully let go of a breath he had been holding and bit his lip. This woman made his blood boil, yet there was a part of him - a big part - that wanted to ravish her, have his way with her.

She got up from the couch and went to the door.

“Whe- where are you going?” Loki asked confused, still recovering from her sudden recoil moments earlier.

“Bed,” she casually offered and lingered by the door.

The moment his brain caught on he was up on his feet and by her side. “Let me escort you to your chambers,” he said with a grin and offered her the crook of his elbow which she gladly took.

“Such a gentleman,” she chuckled.

“Raised to be a king,” he smirked at her and Loki chaperoned her to her chambers.

In front of her door she unhooked herself from his arm and gave him a warm smile. “It has been a lovely evening but I think our paths diverge here,” the warmth still in her voice. “For now,” and she flashed him a cheeky smile.

“Perhaps I can interest you in some late night company?” Loki said with faked innocence but she caught the disappointment in his words and his attempt to mend.

She studied him while she seemed to ponder the options. She crooked her finger to gesture for him to come closer and Loki bent forward, his face close to hers, their breaths mingling. She moved her head and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “No,” she curtly said and went into her room, closing the door with a wink.

Loki stood there, dazed, the kiss burning on his cheek and his veins running with a fire that almost set him alight. His breath escaped him in a ragged manner and it took him a couple of seconds to breath through the desire which riddled his body.

Hoarsely he whispered to the closed door, “I will have you, little priestess.” Right before he turned to walk away he could hear her answer through the door.

“Don’t be so sure of that!”

With a smile on his face Loki left.

 

***

 

She stood on the other side of the door, her cheeks flustered and a little smile on her face. A little paralyzed and with a slight tremor in her knees, she walked to her bed and plowed down, pushing her face in the pillow. She screamed.

She turned to her back and stared at the ceiling. She couldn’t deny it any longer, she wanted him! That infuriating God did things to her she hadn’t felt in a long time and a sadness washed over her. She could not. Not with who she was, it wasn’t possible. Not now, not ever.

Yet he made her feel so delighted, which abhorred her for she couldn’t give him anything real. Absently she put her hand on her chest and thought about the one she had lost. Grief struck her but she couldn’t cry and she was left with a ugly grimace on her face instead.

A sigh which came from deep within her chest escaped her. Would she ever be able to feel anything again? Would her torn heart allow that?

Well, she did feel things and a smirk replaced the grimace. She loved the feeling of control she held over him. Oh, she loved the game they played, his rebellion awakening a fire in her and he kept trying to regain control, knowing it was futile.

Well, that was until he would figure out a way to shut her up and stop her from casting any spell whatsoever. Or until he would take the threads out of his lips because her leverage would surely be gone then.

A scream tore her from her contemplations.

Loki.

It really wasn’t that fortunate that her floor in the tower was directly above Thor’s, and Loki’s bedroom exactly above hers for that matter.

She closed her eyes and focused on him, feeling his Seidr faltering to keep up his illusion and soon his screams ended. Unwillingly she bit her lip. It had been the third night in a row and she wondered how the others hadn’t heard his screaming yet. She quickly figured it probably was a lack of care than not hearing it and for a brief moment she wondered of Thor cared. She had seen him treat Loki harsh but she was sure he loved his little brother.

Suddenly she felt Loki’s Seidr tug on her being and she sighed. She hadn’t given in to the longing to walk his nightmares, to drench in his sorrow and feed on his fear, but now the pull was too strong. She was too curious and she let herself fall in the darkness that would lead her to his nightmare.

 

***

 

She looked around and saw Loki crouching over Odin, his hands reaching for him but stopping in doubt. His eyes were set wild, the rims brimming with tears and carefully he laid his hand on Odin’s.

She could see how anxiety took him over, the level of stress rising beyond his control as he screamed and pleaded for the guards to help him.

When they barged into the room he scurried of to the side, a lost expression on his face. At the order of the guards more people entered the vault, busy with concerning themselves over their king while Loki silently stood there and watched with a blank expression on his face.

She studied his face and she could see that everything just passed him in a haze, too quick to fully comprehend, too slow to actually make any sense.

After the dust had settled and everyone had left, Loki still stood there staring of into nothing. Nobody had bothered him. Nobody had taken the time to talk to him. Nobody had even seemed to be remotely aware that he was there.

He was alone.

It took him some time before he realised it and slowly the glassy look in his eyes faded and he started to move again. He moved as if he was walking through water and his breathing came in shallow breaths.

Silently she followed him.

At the end of the vault she saw him stop in front of the Casket of Ancient Winters and he stared at it. She could see him chewing on the inside of his cheek and he blinked rapidly as if every thought struck him like thunder whilst running in his mind at the speed of lightning.

Suddenly he touched the casket and he looked at his hand which turned blue, his face a mask of curiosity and horror at the same time.

She saw him study his dark nails and the ridges on his skin. Slowly he let go of the casket and his hand went to his face, softly caressing the markings on his cheek, scratching at it with his nail.

His face contorted and she could see the horror and fear he felt crossing on his features.

She could feel his Seidr wrapping around him as he turned back to his Aesir form. Tears streamed down his face and she saw him slump to his knees. An ugly sob escaped his throat and he put his face in his hands.

She hadn’t known what to expect when she entered his nightmare but it hadn’t been this. Suddenly she felt sick to her stomach and she was sure she had overstayed her welcome.

She could feel his Seidr rebuking her, trying to push her out of his nightmare.

He muttered something between his fingers while he shook his head, but it took some time for the words to register in her brain.

With a last look at the broken Prince she pulled herself from his nightmare, the only word he had spoken lingering in her mind.

“Monster.”

 

***

 

With a startle Loki woke, his breaths coming quickly and he almost choked on them because he couldn’t open his mouth. It took him some time to regain control of his breathing and to guide the air through his nose.

When he had calmed down he rubbed a hand over his face and he could feel the sweat sticking to his skin. He grabbed the covers and roughly pulled them aside.

Something that had been lying on the covers flew through his chamber and landed on the floor with a soft thud. Confusement spread across his face because he was sure he had put his book on his nightstand before he went to sleep.

He leapt out of bed and walked to the spot where the thudding sound had come from. It took him a moment to localize the object and he picked it up and brought it to his face.

Between his fingers he held a white piece of bone in the shape of a droplet engraved with blue patterns.

A small smile formed on his lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thrive on comments <3  
> 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank my husband for helping me out with this chapter and headcanoning the events with me.

A fortnight had passed and things started to settle in the Avengers tower. Loki’s behavior had slightly changed. He was less agitated, less snippy and some days even joined in the common room to hang out with the other Avengers which benefited the all over atmosphere in the tower.

Loki had also spend quite some time with Kalypso whether it was in training or them just hanging out and talking about various things.

Loki had to admit he felt more relaxed then he had felt for quite some time even despite his nightmare riddled sleep which often had him waking up covered in cold sweat. He still kept up the illusion to hide the stitches in his lips but his true form looked healthier than it had two weeks ago and he wasn’t deprived of energy so quick. This was probably due to the fact that he consumed a lot of Stark’s weird space food which Kalypso regularly almost shoved down his throat.

He was still a little ashamed that he was dependent on the stuff and frantic tried to hide it - especially the first days - despite everyone knowing it and just plainly ignoring that little ‘problem’. When Tony had figured out he had ordered different flavors without saying anything, and Loki had been grateful for that even though he wouldn’t admit it or thank him, but Tony was pleased as Loki had smiled a little when he had opened the cabinet to discover the variety of flavors.

Tonight they were all sitting in the common room, Loki with a glass of the space food and the others gathered around boxes with pizza and happily chidding away.

“So Lokes,” Tony started as he nowadays addressed the God, to Loki’s utter dismay, “you gonna tell us why you don’t take out those stitches or what?” And Tony took a bit of his pizza, chewing while eyeing the God as if he was casually talking about the weather.

Loki almost choked on his drink at Tony’s blatant question and a muffled cough escaped him as he tried to clear his throat of the liquid.

The room went silent and wary looks crossed the room, Bruce’s eyes big and Natasha biting her lip.

Loki looked at Tony, his glance considerate but the twitching of his eye was obvious as they briefly could almost hear him tick of the pro’s and con’s in his head. Apparently he had reached the end of that list, his choice made, and shot Tony a deadly glare. “No,” Loki simply said, but the cold and dark undertone wasn’t lost on them.

Clint snorted “Why do you even care?” He looked at Tony and Loki avert his deadly glare to the archer.

“Just curious,” Tony offered and tapped with his finger on his lips. “On the other hand I don’t see what will happen that will be so terrible you don’t want to take those wires out or, if indeed it is terrible, we wouldn’t be able to fix it in some way.”

“ _Why_ would we even _help_ him?” Clint said and stared angrily at the God.

Even though the overall demeanor towards Loki had changed, Clint was still furious with the God for what he had done to him and he took every occasion he had to let the God know he hated him.

If Loki’s glare had been deadly before, it was outright murderous right now and Kalypso put a hand on his arm trying to calm him.

“Why would they indeed?” Loki more said than asked with a deadly cold and mocking tone, not breaking the eye contact with Barton.

The question and its implications weren’t lost on Clint and he was very well aware that the question wasn’t aimed at Tony or the other Avengers, but at him. And he knew that Loki actually questioned why they had saved _him_ from the scepter’s influence and not just had given up on the archer.

A wicked smile spread across Loki’s face as he noticed Clint catching on to his question. “Why would they?” he asked with a voice smooth as silk and adding more salt to Clint’s wound.

Suddenly Clint sprang up from the couch, hatred in his eyes and barely refraining himself from grabbing his gun and shooting the God. Instead Barton let out his pent up frustration and nearly screamed at Loki as he spoke. “You had me brainwashed and enslaved for days! You murdered hundreds of innocents and you expect me not the be mad! You expect me to just ‘forget’ all that! Do you even know how much lives you have destroyed, not only by taking them but in ways you probably don’t even imagine! Do you-”

Clint’s angry rant got interrupted by Loki who was just as angry as him now. “Yes, I am aware! Don’t you think for one second that I do not know what has transpired!” Loki venomously spat at him and looking at him with disdain.

“Then why did you do it?” Clint breathed heavily. “Not once have you given an explanation and you just expect us to be okay with everything! Expecting us to help you?”

Loki bared his teeth but remained silent.

“You walk in here reminding us, reminding _me_ , every damn second of those awful moments where my thoughts weren’t mine, where you controlled my every action, turned me against my friends-”

“YOU WEREN’T THE ONLY ONE ENTHRALLED!” Loki screamed and his illusion wavered, green magic sizzling on his fingertips.

The room went deadly silent and they all stared at Loki.

“Wha-what?” Clint stammered, suddenly taken aback by Loki’s words.

Kalypso’s hand fell from Loki’s arm and threateningly he advanced towards the archer, summoning back his illusion. “You have been so busy with your own torment that it never once occurred to you that you weren’t the only one who was enslaved. That maybe, _just maybe_ , I wasn’t acting on free will as well!” Loki could feel the anger burning in his veins, but underneath his fury burned an emotion far more devastating than anger. “You haven’t got any clue what I have been through, what happened before I arrived on Midgard, and _you_ are the last one on this damned realm who has the right to judge me!”

Loki’s furious anger had build to a crescendo of feelings, pain, shame and denial all trying to eat him alive. But underneath all those emotions he felt something tear away at those feelings as if they were nothing than ants under a boot, and raw fear gripped his heart as the memories of his captivity and torment ran through his mind.

The smell of rotten parchment filled the air and quickly Loki stepped away from its source. “Don’t you dare,” he hissed at her. It was only now he noticed that his true emotions shone through his illusion, all of the Avengers seeing the fear he was feeling.

Loki took a deep inhale through his nose and quickly put on an indifferent face, staring each and every one of the Avengers down, daring them to make a move.

“Sir,” Jarvis suddenly spoke. “The terrorist cell that you have been tracking has just been spotted inside the desert of Nevada.”

Tony, who was still staring at Loki with big eyes, spoke as if he was on autopilot. “Everyone, suit up.”

 

***

 

The flight in the helicarrier had been tense. Clint kept glancing at Loki who just returned the glances with deadly stares until Clint couldn’t take it any longer. “Okay, I’m sorry!” he blurted. “I had no right,” and he looked down ashamed.

Loki studied him before he snorted. “No, you had not.”

“I think that is enough for one day,” Natasha said firmly eyeing them both with a warning glare.

Thor sat next to Loki who uncomfortably shifted in his seat and apparently needed to get something of his chest.

“What?” Loki spat.

“I never considered once the reason for your actions against this world and I just-”

“You never asked,” Loki said calm and looked at his brother. “Nobody asked,” and he looked down and Thor could catch the brief sadness washing over Loki’s face.

“We’re here!” Tony announced and the helicarrier touched down softly.

Thor wanted to say something more to Loki but figured there was a time and place for everything, and this wasn’t it.

“Okay people, listen up,” Steve said while clapping his hands. “We do not have much information on this group except that they are dangerous and likely highly trained. We know that they have been into Area 51 and have stolen something there, but since we do not know what, keep your eyes and ears open.” Steve scanned the faces of the Avengers.

“Good speech, Cap,” Tony said and patted him on the back before walking out of the helicarrier.

Steve sighed. “Just… be careful,” and he followed Tony.

Quickly the others - except Bruce who stayed behind and would only join as the Hulk when absolutely necessary - followed suit and they started to move out through the desert, Tony and Kalypso flying around them.

“Stark, there is nothing out here, I think they are underground,” Natasha said speaking through their earpieces.

“I’ll scan the area,” Tony said and flew higher. “Allright Jarvis, what do we got?”

“Sir, there seems to be a underground area half a mile from here,” Jarvis said while pulling up heat scans.

“Good, let’s see if we can drive the desert-rats out!” Tony flew away in the general direction, followed by Kalypso.

By the time the others arrived at the area they both had already scouted it out and were waiting, somewhat impatiently, for the others.

“Anything?” Natasha asked them.

“No entrance as far as I can see,” Kalypso said fidgeting with one of the bones on her suit.

“Then we’ll just have to go through,” Tony offered casually and flew up into the sky, aiming with his hand to the ground. “Move!” he ordered and the Avengers took a few steps back, some of them just in time, before a yellow blast sent sand spraying in every direction. The heat of the beam caught in the sand and send it almost to a boil, heat radiating from it while the Avengers shielded their faces.

Loki’s illusion started to waver, the heat too much for him and he kept walking backwards while trying to shield himself with his arm. Slowly the heat resided as Tony finally hit something else than sand and cut through something metal that was buried beneath the surface.

Loki breathed heavily, the heat of the desert still scorching him and he let his illusion fall just to catch his breath, rapidly breathing through his nose. Kalypso raised an eyebrow at him but with a motion of his hand he brushed the subject off.

“Let’s move in,” Steve said and jumped down into the unknown darkness below.

Natasha and Clint quickly followed after him and on their signal the other followed suit.

Loki was relieved to be underground and in the cool air of the bunker, the coolness sending little prickles across his skin. For a moment he considered summoning his illusion back, but he saw no reason just yet. It was dark and nobody looked at him since he was the last in the line and it would be better to save his energy some more.

Warily they walked through the corridors, Steve or Natasha occasionally calling out something was safe before they moved on.

At the end of a corridor they stumbled upon a big room which was filled with strange looking human-sized capsules in which eerie red liquid glowed. “Where are we?” Natasha whispered looking around warily.

“I’ve got a bad feeling about this,” Tony said in a husked voice and looked through the glass of one of the pods while Jarvis quickly scanned it.

“Sir, the liquid seems to be made of a super-oxygenated liquid protein and perfluorochemical molecules which keeps the lifeform inside sustained of nutrients,” Jarvis spoke in their earpieces.

Clint and Kalypso looked at each other, not knowing what Jarvis just had said but easily picking up on the mentioned lifeform and Clint drew an arrow to his bow while Kalypso started to whisper to have a spell ready on her lips.

Loki kept to the side while inspecting some other oddities in the room when the bunker suddenly shook and dust fell from the ceiling. Everyone froze and warily looked around, looking for a sign of what had caused a tremor so deep under the surface.

Suddenly a loud crash rolled through the room and the pods shook dangerously with the followed impact. Running feet and screams followed the sound of the crash.

“Shit!” Natasha said. “It is a trap, get out! Now!” she barked and suddenly everyone was moving to the door where they had came from which fell shut with a loud bang in front of their noses.

On the balconies adorning the room dark figures with guns appeared and opened fire.

Everyone dove aside or put up their own defences. The glass of a pot shattered and the red liquid poured out, the lifeform inside it gliding across the floor.

Quickly Tony was up in the air taking out the first men with guns while Natasha and Clint climbed to the balconies to help Tony. Thor had hurdled himself onto the balcony with the help of Mjolnir and was almost happily swinging down the enemies.

Loki and Kalypso looked in awe as the lifeform emerged from the red liquid. It looked somewhat like a human except that the skin had a slightly sick green color, its bulbous eyes a fiery yellow and the hands and feet were claws.

Both Loki and Kalypso took a stance next to each other to face the creature and they could see Steve lingering behind the lifeform calculating his next move.

Suddenly the creature lunged quicker than they had anticipated and Loki had to twist to get out of the claws reach. The smell of rotten parchment filled the air and Kalypso wielded her blades in rapid motions driving the creature back who seemed to parry her every move. Steve joined her in the fight as well and Loki summoned two daggers measuring his movements and calculating when to strike.

Then he saw an opening and jumped in, slitting the creatures throat in one fluid motion and drawing thankful looks from Steve and Kalypso. But their victory was short lived as the other pods suddenly opened and Loki saw a man lingering near a control panel. In one fluid motion he threw his dagger enhanced by his magic and instantly killed the man.

Suddenly a gun across the room went of and time seemed to slow down as Loki saw the bullet fly at him; the gun still pointing at him, the aim of it straight between his eyes.

Loki could see the bullet approaching him rapidly and he knew there was nothing he could do. Even with all his abilities to dodge or defend he knew it was futile. This was going to be days of a black out and even more days to heal.

He let out a short exasperated sigh through his nose and braced himself for the incoming impact.

 _If_ he would heal...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thrive on comments <3  
> 


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It might seem like some dub-con entered this chapter, but that isn’t the case. Just read on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thrive on comments <3  
> [Follow me on Tumblr](https://starscreamloki.tumblr.com/)

Loki saw the bullet flying towards him but right before it reached him a black shadow crossed in front of his vision and the expected impact never came.

His eyes grew wide as he saw Kalypso hovering in front of him, the bullet hitting her square in the chest and she flew backwards against Loki and they went down in a tumbling heap. Quickly she sprang to her feet and looked down at her chest where a small bullet hole was visible. She shrugged and turned to Loki, offering him a hand.

Loki didn’t take her hand and just stared at her in disbelief.

She grinned. “I can’t be harmed, remember,” she said with a wink, still offering her hand.

Loki still stared at her with big eyes as the realisation that she just had saved his life sunk in. Quickly he scrambled to his feet, ignoring her offer to help him up, and left the room before any of them could stop him.

 

***

 

She watched the God leave but she didn’t have any time to dwell on it because the weird creatures from the pods filled the room.

The man who had fired the gun had paid with his life twice. Loki’s dagger had hit him squarely in the chest and then Mjolnir had nearly separated his head from his body as Thor had thrown it with a furious roar at the sight of his little brother almost getting killed.

Thor had wanted to go after Loki but enemies blocked his path and it had to wait. Loki could take care of himself, of that he was sure.

The Avengers were surrounded by the weird green lifeforms and it took them some time to take them out. The things were extremely quick and Kalypso could see how Natasha and Clint were having trouble keeping up with their rapid attacks, getting scratched in various places multiple times.

She was also on her hind legs, vigorously parraying one of the creature’s claws while she had to keep the spells falling from her lips to match its speed. Steve came to her aid to distract the creature and create an opening for her so she could plunge her dagger through his skull.

Clint had forfeited his attempts at close combat and was back up on the balcony trying to shoot the lifeforms down or distracting them while Natasha sprung and danced around it and slowly taking it down.

Thor just depended on his brute force and swung Mjolnir vigorously at the creature, until he concluded he couldn’t hit it and just blasted of some lighting, frying the lifeform.

Tony was up in the air, aiding who he could with his repulsor beams and sometimes diving to barrel one down to get it out of the way so it couldn’t harm one of his friends.

Eventually there were only two more lifeforms left which the team quickly neutralized in practiced precision and the fight was over.

The room was littered with bodies. Natasha and Clint did a quick sweep of the room to see if there were any alive while Tony took some samples from the liquid from the pods and took blood from the creatures.

“Where did Loki go?” Thor asked her.

“I don’t know,” she said while she wiped the gore of her sword on a dead man that was lying at her feet.

Steve approached them. “What happened? One moment Loki was there and the next he was gone.”

“The coward,” Clint said bitter but quickly pushed his lips together as he realised the slip he had made. Softly he muttered an apology while eyeing Thor who paid him no heed.

She eyed Thor and Steve. “We were done with fighting the first creature when suddenly a gun went off. It was aimed at Loki’s head so I placed myself between him and the incoming bullet.” With her finger she pried in her leather suit and took out the bullet that shone silver between her fingers.

“You saved his life?” Thor asked incredulous.

“Well, I’m not sure I did that. He’d probably have healed from it and…” she trailed of as she saw Thor purse his lips and shake his head.

“That bullet would probably have proven fatal, milady. You did save his life. Thank you,” and Thor placed a hand on her shoulder.

Steve hummed. “But where did he go?”

She looked around the room and to the door through which Loki had left. It was the same direction they had came from before stumbling upon the room. “I think he went back to the helicarrier,” she answered. “And if not, then we will probably run into him on our way back.”

Steve nodded. “Okay team, wrap it up and let’s go!”

 

***

 

Loki wandered through the corridors of the bunker, the events of what just had transpired pounding through his head. He grinded his teeth and he couldn’t wipe the snarl of his face as he still tried to comproherent _what_ had happened.

One moment he was looking death in the eye and the next she was in front of him, literally taking the bullet.

Why would she do that? Had it simply been just because she could? Just because she couldn’t get killed? That couldn’t be it. He had seen her hurt, bleeding even when Natasha had sliced her calf, she could be harmed and probably wasn’t invincible.

Then why? Why would she have done it? He knew they had grown close over the past couple of weeks but it certainly wasn’t worth it to risk her life. Wasn’t it?

Loki tapped his lips with his fingers, the touch of the thread sending little prickles through his mouth. He wondered if he would’ve done the same. If it had been her life on the line, would he have jumped in to catch the bullet?

He wasn’t sure of the answer. One part of him screamed that it was preposterous. There was no way he could’ve deflected the bullet that quickly to save his life and emerge from it unharmed himself. On the other hand something within him said he would have, even if he had to pay with his life.

Loki leaned against the wall and put his head back, closing his eyes. What was it about her that made him doubt himself so much? He knew who he was, right? Then why was she able to push all his buttons? His mind lingered. Did he truly knew who he was or was that just a lie he told himself? Another lie that his life-

Loki’s thoughts got interrupted as he heard voices coming from down the hallway and he quickly moved to hide in a side corridor, casting an illusion to make himself invisible.

He saw how the Avengers passed him by, their movements still wary in anticipation of an attack. When they bend around the corner it suddenly hit Loki that Kalypso hadn’t been among them and an unexpected feeling of fear gripped his heart.

Quickly he left his hiding spot, heading in the direction the Avengers had came from, heading in the direction of the room where they had fought!

Ominous thoughts clouded his mind. Where was she? Had something happened? She couldn’t be dead, right? She had just taken a bullet and had seemed fine. Or had that been a trick of his mind and had he missed that she actually had been hurt, that the bullet had done damage? It could not be!

Panic raced through his body as he started to run towards the room, his breathing coming in heavy, arduous snorts through his nose.

When he reached the room he skidded to a stop and he couldn’t believe what he saw.

Kalypso stood there in the middle of the room, her arms raised from her sides, her head back as the lifeforms and men raised from their fallen positions coming into motion. One by one they shuffled towards her and lowered their head a little so she could look at them. When the first one reached her she touched the man and his form started to wither, the flesh pulling taut over muscle and bone, rotting and eventually decaying until nothing was left.

Multiple of the dead man and creatures reached her at once and when they touched her the process repeated. The last one was behind her and she turned around and looked down on the lifeform that crawled to her, it’s legs too mangled to be able to stand on it but still wanting to heed the call of its mistress. She crouched and placed a hand on its forehead and the last lifeform decayed as well, a small smile on her lips.

Suddenly she noticed the pair of boots standing not so far away from her and with a startle she jolted up right. “Loki!” she exclaimed while she looked at him with big eyes. “How- ho-,” she stuttered as she looked at him like a deer in the headlights. “How long have you been standing there?” she finally managed.

By now Loki had his illusion in place so he was able to answer her, his voice was dark and restrained. “Long enough,” and he turned on his heel to walk away.

“Loki! Please wait!” She ran after him and grabbed his arm.

Briskly he turned around. “What?” he sneered at her.

She looked down and even with all her might she suddenly felt very small, her cheeks paling ever so slightly. “P- Please, don’t- don’t tell the others,” she begged and carefully looked up to see his response.

His eyes were set dark, his face a mask and he pulled his arm from her grasp. He snorted and turned around, briskly stalking away in the direction the other Avengers had gone a little while ago.

He could hear her sigh which sounded like a sob as he left her standing there. He didn’t stop her when she followed him, her pace one step behind his while she occasionally sobbed, but Loki cared not and he was very sure those sobs were fake.

He stepped out of the bunker into the desert heat, the sun scorching his skin and the brightness burning his eyes, but he cared not for the pain the vicious orb bestowed upon him.

His feelings that had been a mess earlier had untangled themselves and opened his eyes to this woman.

Things finally made sense.

 

***

 

On the flight back Loki and Kalypso hadn’t spoken although Loki had stared at her the entire time and when she had asked him what was wrong, he had only mischievously smiled at her in response.

When they got back to the tower she quickly made for her room in desperate need of a shower and some time to herself.

Just as she had slipped out of her suit, Loki entered her room and saw her standing in nothing but her underwear. A devilish grin spread across his face as he looked her up and down, his eyes ravishing her body.

“What do you want?” she snarled.

“I came to speak with you,” his eyes still roaming her exposed skin. “But I might have changed my mind.”

“There is nothing to talk about,” she answered coldly and turned to walk to the bathroom but he grabbed her wrist.

“Oh, I think we have plenty to talk about,” and his devilish grin spread wider. Goosebumps ran up and down her spine as she looked in his green eyes that held nothing but malice, his face set in a predatory grin.

“Let me go.” She struggled to break free from his grasp, but it was too strong, his fingers locked around her wrist like iron shackles.

Her eyes changed as anger rose in her and Loki caught up on that. He roughly put his free hand across her mouth, rendering her unable to use her spells. With a stride his body was pressing against hers, the leather gracing her skin and he forced her back against the wall with a few quick steps while he quickly grabbed her other wrist as well and pinned her hands above her head against the wall, his other hand never leaving her mouth.

“Little _Kerling_ ,” he whispered in her ear, his voice dark and filled with malice, “you might not know it but I always get what I want. Struggle all you want but I can tell you your attempts will be in vein.” He pulled back to look her in the eyes, but he could see nothing there, confirming his suspicions. She showed no anger, no desire but above all, no fear.

Loki leaned back in to whisper in her ear again, his voice hoarse, “and right now I want you.”

The grip on her wrists tightened but she only looked at him deadpanned, not giving him the satisfaction.

“Now here is what is going to happen,” Loki said while holding her gaze. “I’m going to let go of your mouth, no spells, no tricks and you are going to show your true form.”

A brief glint of fear crossed her eyes and Loki smiled.

“Oh yes. I know. You see, it wasn’t that hard to figure it out but when I caught you in that bunker all my suspicions got confirmed, Kalypso.”

Her eyes grew wide with disbelief and dread.

“Or should I address you with what you truly are? Draugr!”

With the last word her eyes grew even wider and Loki could almost smell her fear and she started to struggle in his grasp. He snarled at her, baring his teeth and put more pressure on her mouth and wrists, locking her in place until her trashing ceased. She angrily eyed him but within seconds he could see that change into acceptance and surrender.

He smiled and took his hand of her mouth. “Show me,” he casually commanded.

She set her jaw, the options running through her mind but she knew it was of no use and with a sigh she looked down. She closed her eyes and pulled on her being, stripping away the layers of human fat and muscle, showing grey skin that was pulled taut over blackened bone which showed on many places through it. Her teeth became pointy and her lips were no more, showing the roots of those teeth in her black skull. Her eyes were replaced by little fires which gleamed a fiery blue and couldn’t show any form emotion anymore.

Loki snorted. “Your quarrel was never with the undead, was it now?” he asked her, his tone softer than she might have expected it would be.

“No,” she spoke, her voice sounding like bone grinding over stone. “Why would you care?”

“You lied,” he stated casually and her head snapped up, the blue fire in her eyes burning harder.

“Of course I lied, what else would you have done, oh _God of Lies_?!” she snapped at him. “Do you think they would accept it if they knew an undead roamed their tower, was their colleague, their friend? I think not! They would despise me, think I am the enemy and try to kill me on spot.” Rage radiated from her but Loki was unimpressed.

“Which, by the way, ain’t an easy feat and will only end up hurting and infuriating me,” she finished.

Loki chuckled. “And yet Natasha made you bleed.”

“It happens,” she shrugged. “Now if you’d be so kind to let me go,” she sneered.

“Why should I? I can’t harm you, can I now?”

“No, you can’t,” and this time it was her grin which looked malicious, the lack of flesh giving the smile a morbid look. “Only a hero can!”

Loki’s eyes widened and the snarl was back on his face. Roughly he shoved her aside, letting go of her wrists in the process, and took a step back while looking at her, his face contorted in fury. The meaning of it all finally sinking in. It didn’t bother him that he wasn’t a hero, he couldn’t care less, but the fact that he couldn’t harm her in any way was something that bothered him dearly. And what bothered him even more was that his brother was probably able to harm her while Thor had done things in his life that surely didn’t make him a hero!

Suddenly the stench of rotten parchment lingered in the air. Loki had been so caught up in his rage that he briefly had lost her out of his eye and before he knew it she was in front of him, breaking away his illusion. With her bony hand she reached for his face and he stepped back while she stepped with him until his back hit the wall.

He tried to turn his face away but the sharp bones from her fingers grabbed his jaw, digging in his flesh, and with the other she placed one such bony finger behind almost all of the stitches in his mouth, stretching them to their limits, and leaned in. “I am not the only one who has been hiding something, Loki Odinson.”

Fear struck his heart as he struggled to break free, but this time it was she who had the upper hand. She increased the pull on the wires and Loki couldn’t move with the force of the pull for her fingers dug into his cheeks, keeping his head in place.

She leaned forward and whispered in his ear, the smell of rot and death filling his nose. It took a moment before her words had traveled past his fear and registered in his brain, sending shudders down his spine.

In a single fluid motion she ripped the threads from his mouth.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry folks, no smut for this story.

Loki could feel the threads break and rip through his flesh, the taste of blood filling his mouth and a searing pain traveling through his flesh.

It was only seconds before he could feel his blood starting to turn cold, his skin crawling with a tingling feeling as the magic bound within the threads started to work.

Her words rampaged in his mind, wreaking havoc and leaving nothing but utter terror in their wake.

_Or should I say Loki Laufeyson?_

She let go of him and took a step back watching as his skin turned blue. His eyes became just as red as the blood that covered his mouth, the black threads protruding from his flesh where they had broken.

She could see the fury pass his features but it was quickly replaced by utter horror. He fixed her with a steel gaze, for the first time since weeks breathing through his mouth which came in short and angry gasps while he tried to decide what to do.

He broke their gaze and his eyes looked to the door and he darted for it, but she beat him to it, blocking his path. “You are not going anywhere,” she threatened, her teeth clattering while she spoke.

Loki lunged and grabbed her by the throat - what was left of it anyway - and ice krept up her jawline and down to her collarbones, his features contorted in a mix of anger and grief, tears brimming his eyes.

“If you leave you will stay in this form,” she casually said, breaking the ice on her jaw and not in the slightest deterred by his grip on her throat. “If you stay, we might be able to work something out.”

Loki stared at her, his feelings a maelstrom trying to tear him up inside. All he wanted to do was leave this room and hide for eternity until he had found a solution or the sweet salvation of death would take him, but her words held him back from throwing her aside and actually leaving. He took a couple of deep breaths to steady himself and slowly let go of her.

With her bony fingers she scratched at the ice and it crumbled from her collarbone. She pulled on her magic and the fat and muscle came back to her form, her skin turning human again and her eyes no longer blazing with that blue fire.

She walked past Loki, who turned with her, put on a shirt and pants that were lying on the floor, and she sat down on the single chair that adorned the room, gesturing to Loki to take place on the bed.

He took a step back while he eyed her and hit the door with his back, which he decided was as good as any, and he slumped down along the door, sitting on the floor with one leg tucked underneath him. He looked at his blue hand and once again tears brimmed his eyes.

‘ _Remove the threads and your Seidr will get completely blocked, even to a point where you turn into your Jotun form, until your end of days or until I grace you with absolution._ ’ Odin’s words pounded through Loki’s skull.

“You have no idea what you have done,” he mumbled at Kalypso.

“I do,” came her curt reply and Loki’s head snapped up. “I took me sometime to put the pieces together, but now I’ve got you where I want you.” Her sweet smile was unsettling.

Loki didn’t like that he had been played, but on the other hand he had to admit he was impressed because not many were able to do that, yet it left a sting. “What do you want from me?” he growled.

“It’s simple. Your father Od-”

“Not my father as you can see,” he interrupted her and gesturing at his skin, fixing her with a glare.

She sighed. “Odin,” she pointitly said, “has my phylactery. I am the one Thor is hunting.”

“How are you so sure?”

“There currently are multiple Draugr on Midgard but none with the Lich part I have, so I’m sure he is after me.” She tilted her head and Loki only nodded.

“And you want me to get your phylactery?” Loki asked. She nodded. “And what do I get in return?” he asked bitter.

“I can destroy the magic that currently is blocking your Seidr.”

Loki’s eyes widened. “How?” he asked incredulous.

“If I told you then I would lose my leverage. I’m not stupid, God of Mischief,” she said while wagging her finger.

Loki smiled and bit his lip, his teeth gracing the wounds of the destroyed flesh and he flinched. “What will you do when you have your phylactery?”

She sighed and smiled ruefully at him. “I will destroy it.”

Loki’s brows furrowed. “You are going to kill yourself?”

“Yes,” she stated plainly.

Loki - this time choosing a less painful option - licked his lips and tasted the blood, his tongue gracing the wires that still protruded from it. The wounds were already healing and he reached up to pull one such thread from his flesh, grimacing as he did so. When he got the thread out he studied it and his eyes flicked back to her. “Why?”

She barked a laugh and he raised an eyebrow as he reached for the next thread.

“Why? Because I’m done with this undead life. It was never my choice to become like this and I’ve been around for so long that I long for death. True death! Not this- this-” she stuttered while she gestured at herself in frustration. “No more, I’m done,” she mumbled and Loki could see the sheer exhaustion of centuries wash over her face.

He grimaced as he took out the next wire and flicked it aside. “Pray tell me, how did you become like this?”

A ominous look crossed her face. “Your sister-”

“Sister?” Loki hissed questioningly.

“Yes.” She looked at him and shook her head at his confused look. “You don’t know this, but you have a sister, Hela.” She bit her lip and her eyes glazed over, seeming as she was caught in a long distant memory. She smiled wistfully while she spoke absently, “you remind me of her a lot actually.” A short silence followed before she snapped out of her stupor. “The time you will learn more about her will come, and the time you meet her as well. But your sister Hela, is the Goddess of Death. She… made me. Or better said, unmade me.”

“Why?”

She shrugged. “If I only knew. Probably because she could, or just wanted to, or because I looked at her wrongly. I don’t know.”

“And your magic?” Loki asked curious.

“I already wielded magic when I was a living and breathing Aesir, that never changed.” She tilted her head.

“I see.” Loki licked his lips again and felt a little pang of joy when his tongue glided past unmarred flesh, the wounds healed and the stitches no more. Yet the price he had to pay for that had been too high. Far too high. He thought about the offer Kalypso had made him and a smile formed on his lips. “Alright, I’ll help you find your phylactery if you in return destroy the magical bonds that are currently placed upon me.”

She nodded and looked at him. “What more?” she asked.

Loki gave her a confused look.

“I can hear in your voice that there is more you want. Spill it!” she snarled at him.

“You were able to take my illusions away,” Loki mused, “and I wondered-”

“If I could place one as well to hide your blue skin, Laufeyson?” she asked him, the last word sending a jab through his soul and making him briefly cringe. Loki nodded.

She motioned with her finger for him to come to her and Loki got up and obliged.

“What do I get in return?” she asked.

“What do you want?”

She tapped her finger to her lips and a wicked smile spread across her face. “I want you to spend the night with me, to… finish what you started an hour ago, so to speak.”

Loki took a step back. He had not expected that! “You are an undead. C-can… How?” he stuttered.

She tilted her with a mischievous grin. “Take the offer and you will find out,” she snickered.

Loki briefly seemed to think on it but then shrugged. “Oh well, why not.”

She got up from her chair, lips already moving in a spell and the scent of rotten parchment filling the air. She suddenly grabbed him by the collar and pulled him into a kiss, her lips warm on his cold skin, sending shivers down his spine.

Slowly he could feel her magic hooking on his being and when he briefly glimpsed down at his hand, it was no longer blue.

 

***

 

They lay in her bed next to each other, Loki lazedly drawing patterns on her upper arm while he still drifted on the fuzzy clouds in his head left by their lovemaking. It had been… different, to say the least, but definitely not unpleasant - and for his pleasure only - and Loki wouldn’t mind if it would happen again or even become a thing between them. No feelings, no attachments, just lust and desire and nothing more.

“How are we going to get to Asgard?” she asked him.

Loki hummed. “I don’t know,” he said lazidly.

“You don’t know? Then how are-”

“I’ll come up with something but not right now.”

“Still dizzy from me fucking your brain out?” she smirked at him.

He gave her an incredulous look. “Such a filthy mouth,” Loki mumbled and snickered at her glare. “Maybe I just don’t want to think about it right now. Or maybe I already have a plan. Or maybe indeed my brain is still fuzzy though I highly doubt that. You will never know,” he grinned.

She grabbed him by the throat and crawled on top of him. “Tell me,” she said mischievous while applying a little pressure on his throat.

“It depends,” he casually offered.

“On what?” she threatened.

“If my sister is still a…” he tapped his finger on his lips, “an inconvenience or not,” he finished.

She narrowed her eyes dangerously but Loki didn’t back away. “You want me to lead you to your phylactery which was made by my sister, as you told me. Isn’t there a change she will be around?”

“Was she?” Kalypso asked a little frightened and let go of his throat.

Loki rolled his eyes. “Now who has fucked whose brain out that you can’t even remember my reaction when you told my I had a sister?” he berated her and grabbed her jaw and pushed her of him on her back while he rolled with her so he ended on top.

He leaned forward until their faces were inches apart. “So tell me, Little Draugr, will Hela oppose a problem?”

Kalypso’s eyes flared at the mention of her true being and reached for his throat again but this time Loki caught her hand and quickly pinned down the other and gave her a defying look and stared her down.

She licked her lips and sighed. “I don’t know,” she answered and a painful memory became almost visible on her face. “The last time I saw her was when she…” Kalypso’s eyes glazed over and stared into nothingness.

“She made you?” Loki asked and let go of her arms and rolled to his side to lie next to her.

“Unmade me,” she corrected him.

“How does that work?” He asked curious.

Her eyes flared again and immediately Loki was on alert, his hands ready to catch whatever blow she would punch his way, but it never came and she just looked at him with a profound sadness in her eyes.

Carefully he placed a hand on her cheek and studied her while she leaned into his gentle touch.

“I died and she pulled me back.” She swallowed and Loki stroked his thumb on her face encouraging her to tell the story.

“I don’t remember much of my living life-”

“Does it matter?” he mumbled under his breath.

“No, but all I know is that I was Aesir and it might be nice if I could remember my name.” She smiled. “But I don’t remember that and I only-”

“Then what does it matter?” he interrupted her again.

She playfully smacked him across the cheek. “Are you going to keep interrupting me or should I find a needle and thread again to sew your mouth shut so I can tell my story?” Briefly her eyes blazed but that subsided the moment she saw the twinkle in his eyes. She sighed at his mischievous smile.

“Like I said, I don’t remember much from my living days but I remember dying. It was painful, lonely, I was surrounded by darkness and the cold I was feeling coming from my soul battled the warm blood that was pouring from my stabbed heart. Suddenly the pain stopped and I could no longer feel the cold, completely numb, and from the darkness she emerged, reaching out a hand to take it. For whatever reason I took it and I got pulled back to the world of the living. I was among others who she had pulled back as well and she studied me, her eyes boring into my very soul, stripping away each layer and seeing everything I had ever done and had ever been. She then smiled at me, the dark and sinister one,” she looked at Loki, “you have the same dangerous smile sometimes.” She flicked a teasing finger over his cheek and he smiled mischievous.

“Apparently she gauged me up and then bade me to come closer, which I did. The moment she touched me I felt my skin prick and slowly a pain crept through it, started eating at sinew and my muscles and I remember falling to the floor writhing in pain, not even able to scream or do anything else. I felt how each bone in my body broke and mended itself, over and over again. I felt how true Death took hold of me and ripped my soul into a thousand pieces, layer by layer, piece by piece. I don’t know how long it lasted but every second was one to much. I felt how I got torn apart and rebuild again, unable to stop it or to scream.”

She pinched the bridge of her nose. “She unmade me, Loki. That is how it feels to be unmade.”

Loki looked at her and pulled his hand away from her cheek. It was one of those rare occasions where he didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t feeling sorry for her, and he was sure she didn’t want to feel sorry for her, yet her story had send chills down his spine. He rolled to his back and stared at the ceiling until her head suddenly came into view.

“I don’t know if Hela will oppose a problem but she is a force to be reckoned with. She has the same abilities as every Aesir; the strength, speed, stamina and such, but it is her magic that is - just as yours - very dangerous. I have seen her firing deadly bolts of energy, aging and even killing anyone who got in her way. And even more problematic, she can create illusions as well, just like you and me, and she even knows how to take them away, just like me, but she can also manipulate illusions from others and trap them in there.” She trailed her thumb over his lip, caressing it gently. “Just don’t-”

“Underestimate her. You already told me,” Loki interrupted her and playfully tried to catch her thumb between his teeth.

He sighed and closed his eyes, his mind reeling and the gears kicking into motion, ticking of all the possibilities he had with the current information.

“Has my story unsettled you?” Kalypso interrupted his reverie and Loki’s eyes shot open.

“No,” he said curtly, “I’m merily pondering the challenges we might encounter if she is in Asgard. Though I highly doubt it because I have never seen her, let alone heard of her.”

Kalypso nodded. “Oh, one more thing! Hela is not alone, or, she wasn’t at least. She always had a big, black wolf on her side named Fenris. I’m still not sure what sort of creature that is, but it is as big as a house and you might not want to encounter it.”

“Me? You make it almost sound as if I am going alone,” Loki retorted which drew a snicker from her.

“We. I meant we,” she said and kissed him while he eagerly returned the kiss.

When their kiss broke Loki was grinning wildly.

“What?” Confusion washed over her face.

“This is going to be so much fun,” he said with that same unsettling smile.

“Going back to Asgard or what is left of this evening… Night?” she teasingly asked.

Quickly Loki grabbed her wrists while rolling on top of her and pinning her to the bed. “Both,” he said as he dove in for another hungry kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thrive on comments <3  
> [Follow me on Tumblr](https://starscreamloki.tumblr.com/)


	10. Chapter 10

For the past two days Kalypso had held up Loki’s illusion. It would wear of in time but for now it stayed.

But the Prince had fallen back in his arrogant and belittling ways, still trying to control her and a fight between them had ensued. Of course he had been no match, especially since she could control him with a whim of her magic but it had left her blood boiling in her veins at his insolence.

Still she had to treat careful because he could harm her by telling Thor who she really was and she couldn’t compete with the God of Thunder. Loki couldn’t harm her, but she was sure Thor very much could and even though she couldn’t die nor feel any real pain, a broken body wasn’t something she was waiting for, let alone being dragged to Asgard to be thrown at the feet of Odin from who she didn’t know what he wanted from her or do to her.

She stared at the ceiling and sighed. But that little Prince on the other hand had overstepped his boundaries - again - and he would pay for that. With a devilish smile she closed her eyes when she heard him scream again, trapped in a nightmare, and plunged into the familiar darkness that would lead to his horrid dreams.

 

***

 

It took her a few moments to get her bearings. She looked around and noticed she was on the Bifrost, it’s end shattered and Odin holding on to something that was hanging from the bridge.

She inched closer to the edge and saw Thor hanging in Odin’s grasp, and beneath him hanging from Gungnir, Loki.

She had no idea what had happened here or why Loki was looming above the abyss, but an evil smile spread across her face. She had come here to punish Loki, to toy with him and to show him she wasn’t to be messed with or even to be suppressed, and just as she wanted to manipulate the nightmare, it already turned into a nightmare on itself.

She heard how Odin rejected his youngest and she saw the devastating pain on Loki’s face, in his eyes, and she saw him let go. A conscious decision, determined but yet one she understood so very well.

She was pulled into the abyss with Loki, their decent slow and swift at the same time, floating in a place where there was no time except darkness and loneliness. She didn’t know how long it had taken, maybe it had been hours but it had felt like mere seconds and someone pulled him out of that darkness and threw his broken body on the ground of some dusty realm.

Again she got pulled into the darkness and the next thing she knew, or actually heard, were Loki’s agonizing screams tearing through her eardrums, skull and even soul if she still had that. She watched as he got tortured at the hands of these strange creatures, his body quivering and nothing but fright in his eyes.

It shocked her to see him in utter fear because even a couple of nights ago when she had pulled the threads from his lips there still had been a spark of defiance beneath his fear, but here she couldn’t see it.

Again the darkness.

She saw Loki’s broken body lying on the floor, his head on his arm, fully covered in dust and blood supporting numerous of bleeding wounds and burn marks. He was saying something but she couldn’t hear what because his arm muffled the sound and his voice was too soft.

Again she got pulled into the darkness and the scenes, which she was pretty sure where his memories, followed rapidly. She saw how they broke him over and over again. He screamed, he cried and sobbed, but above all, he begged.

The once arrogant Prince was humbled and broken, begged for them to stop, begged them to no longer inflict pain upon him, but that hadn’t been the worst of it all.

Because there is a point where one does not beg anymore, either because they resign to their faith or because they are too exhausted to do so. In Loki’s case it was a mix of both and he was reduced to nothing but a whimpering mess, body and mind broken, when he coldly spoke to his tormentors.

Not once did he say that, or twice, no, a dozen times and more. Coldly at first, exhausted later and desperate near the end of it all.

She hear all of it, saw all of it, _felt_ all of it as his words cut through her mind, shattering the last remnants of her heart and soul for she understood so very well what he longed for.

She had come to his nightmare to make it worse but she didn’t need to because they were already at their worst and now she felt guilty. Because not only did he dreamed about this, he had lived through it and every night he relived it again.

She left his nightmare, the words that had shattered her last remnants pounding in her head, repeating over and over again and wrecking her because she understood so well what he had asked for.

_Just take my life..._

_I don’t want it anymore._

**_Take it!_ **

**_KILL ME!_ **

 

***

 

Loki woke covered in sweat and carefully opened his eyes. Something had been off this night, in his nightmare. He knew it because he had felt it, a presence that didn’t belong there had been there.

He turned his head to the side and saw a little bone in the form of a teardrop lying in the middle of the white pillow. This one was black but was also covered with intercrate blue patterns.

Loki sighed and snatched it from the pillow and pushed himself upright. From his nightstand he grabbed the other bone he had gotten over a fortnight ago and he studied both of the droplet shaped bones in his hand, their intercrate blue patterns almost dancing in front of his eyes and seeming to glow and glide across the surface.

Loki closed his hand around the little pieces and smiled.

 

***

 

A couple of days had passed and it had taken Kalypso and Loki some time to form a plan to get to Asgard. Their biggest problem was Thor who under almost no circumstance let Loki out of his eyesight, let alone bring him and her to Asgard if they’d ask and didn’t have a good reason for it.

But luck had been on their side, or actually Thor’s trust in Kalypso that she could ‘babysit’ Loki for a day while Thor went on a mission with the other Avengers.

Kalypso had just plainly refused to come along on the mission, not even playing the ‘I do not feel so well card’, and they had been fine with that. Of course Loki hadn’t bothered to play that card either and had just plainly announced that he would stay with her, drawing some skeptical looks from the Avengers. It almost became a question who would babysit who, but in the end they had dropped the matter - Thor handing the chains to Kalypso who was unaware that the chains didn’t have effect anymore since Loki’s Seidr was already blocked - and had taken off.

Kalypso and Loki wasted no time suiting up and got ready to leave as soon as the Quinjet was out of sight because they would face even more obstacles before they would even arrive on Asgard.

The first one presented itself immediately when Loki wanted to open the door to the staircase that would lead down, and was the exact reason they had avoided the elevator. “Sir, I’m sorry, but I can’t let you go through that door. I’m under strict orders not to let you pass,” Jarvis said.

Loki sighed and rolled his eyes. They had already expected this, but it would have been nice if this hadn’t been the case.

“It’s open,” Kalypso said triumphant as she put her dagger away and stepped back from the wall where a tile was missing, showing the wires that lay behind it. Loki smirked and looked inside. There were a lot of wires and he had to be careful not to touch the wrong one or he would get electrocuted, something he really did not want in his current state, and carefully he put his hand in the tangled mess. Upon his touch the wires started to freeze over and ice crept up along the wall near it.

“Sir, what are you doing?” Jarvis asked.

“Calm down Jarvis. He is fixing some things,” Kalypso grinned and with a click they could hear the lock in the door unlock. They opened the door and quickly ran down the stairs but their path was blocked by yet another door.

“Why are there doors in the middle of a staircase?” she asked incredulous to no one in particular.

“Paranoia,” Loki mumbled while he looked for the tile behind which the wires would be, but there was none. They searched the wall but found none and Loki clenched his jaw.

“Now what?” she asked him.

“Now we are going to see how strong Tony’s doors are,” Loki said and grinned wide as he placed his hands on the door. Ice crept over it’s surface and soon the entire door was covered. “Milady,” Loki inclined his head to her, “if you would like to do the honours?” And he took a step back.

She gave him an amused look and started to whisper, the air filling with her characteristic smell of magic and she send it whirling against the door which shattered to a thousand pieces on impact.

Loki looked at her, his expression impressed. He had known her magic was powerful, but he hadn’t imagined it would be this powerful and a renewed sense of respect kindled his heart.

They ran down the stairs again and any door that they encountered they either froze the wires in the wall or just broke through, until they were in the foyer and ran outside before anyone could stop them.

Loki looked around him, not knowing which way to go because he had not been outside the tower once - except on missions where they would depart with the Quinjet but that hadn’t put him on the streets - and he was still deciding where to go when she grabbed his sleeve and dragged him along.

“How do you know which way to go?” he hissed at her.

“I don’t, but I know our little escape has send warnings to the team and we cannot afford to linger near the tower,” she snarled at him while still dragging him down the streets. “We may praise ourselves lucky if we can keep them of our scent as it is,” she mused and finally let go off his sleeve, Loki trailing after her.

“That’s fine and all but our destination is the other way,” he casually offered and pointed with his thumb over his shoulder.

She stopped dead in her tracks and eyed him furious. “If you are going to keep up the attitude, then let me know now so I can magic your mouth shut again so I’ll not have to listen to your _ormstunga_ ,” she spat at him and bared her teeth.

Loki put on a wounded face but then barked a laugh and closed the distance between them with one step and leaned over to whisper in her ear. “Two nights ago you had no problem whatsoever with my snake Tongue.”

Shudders ran down her spine as his hot breath graced her ear and his cold lips ghosted over her shell.

“I already thought so,” Loki said with a twinkle in his eyes when he pulled back. “You knew what you started, now stop your whining, _kerling_ , and follow me,” he commanded and started walking in another direction, taking the lead.

She let out a breath she didn’t know she had been helding and quickly paced after the God of Mischief.

After a half hour walking Loki stopped. They were in a park near the East river and Loki looked out over the water, his eyes narrowed scanning the horizon.

“What?” she asked him?

“I can feel the rift is near, there actually,” he pointed to the Roosevelt Island, “however I can’t-” he broke his sentence and pursed his lips.

She looked at him impatiently, her foot tapping and her arms crossed but Loki said nothing and stared at the horizon. “We don’t have much time, you know,” she pressed but still Loki said nothing. She let out an annoyed sigh. “What is the hold up? Why are you standing there. We should-”

“BECAUSE I DON’T KNOW HOW TO GET THERE!” he suddenly screamed at her, startling some people who were passing by, the air around them dropping a couple of degrees at his outburst.

For a moment she was taken aback but soon she bursted out into laughter which drew an angry pout from Loki. “Great God of Deceit. Tried to take over New York with an army of Chitauri and yet you can’t find your way around that very city. How very amusing.”

The dark and threatening look he gave her was enough for her to check her tongue, albeit it for this time because she felt some pity for him. Not once since he had arrived here had he set foot outside the tower and a feeling of loneliness lodged itself in her cold, dead heart. It was one of the few feelings she had, and she was very familiar with it, and she figured Loki must have often felt the same during his stay here on Midgard.

“Come on,” she said and started walking again, not any longer wanting to look in those green eyes that shone with frustration but also with pain, because she was sure he had caught up on her line of thinking and was probably feeling and thinking the same.

After some time they were in the subway to the Roosevelt Island, Loki throwing the ‘peasants’ disgusting looks whenever they got to close to him and he was happy when they left the torturous device of transportation, wasting no time to get above ground.

Immediately he set the pace and course to the south-west part of the island. They walked in silence while she occasionally glimpsed at him, trying to gauge his feelings, but she could read nothing as his face was set stern.

Suddenly the sky went dark with thick, grey clouds and Loki jerked his head up, a little bit of dread crossing his features. She picked up on it as well and broke into a run, Loki quickly sprinting after her and passing her by. Zigzagging past some Humans on the street they finally reached their destination and they stopped in front of the Smallpox Hospital Ruins.

Still frantically scanning the sky Loki mumbled, “it should be in there,” and he pointed to the ruins that was surrounded by a gate.

“Better hurry,” she retorted and bolted for the gate, Loki on her heels.

“Freeze it!” she said with a high-pitched voice as a crackle of thunder split the dark sky.

“So bossy,” Loki muttered and grabbed the lock, freezing it under his touch.

“BROTHER!” Thor’s voice boomed through the sky just as the lock shattered and they pushed the gate open, darting for the ruins.

“It should be-” A crack of thunder split above the ruins, making the walls shake and dust falling from the walls. “-here.” Loki finished his sentence as he pointed to a wall.

Kalypso eyed him as if he was mad. “That is just a wall!” she pointed and turned around as a loud thud sounded behind them.

“LOKI!” Thor bellowed and Loki turned on his heel.

“Hello, Thor,” he said dryly. “What an unpleasant surprise.”

Thor snorted. “What are you doing?” he demanded.

“Oh, you know,” Loki said while grabbing Kalypso by the wrist and carefully taking a step back, dragging her along. “Just a walk in the park and some sight-seeing,” and he threw him a disarming smile.

“Let go of the lady. You do not need to drag her into you twisted games.” Thor eyed her with concern.

Loki cackled a laugh. “On the contrary,” Loki retorted with a gleeful smile and he took another step back until he knew he was standing against the wall, Kalypso at his side.

“Are you sure about this?’ she asked him under her breath while eyeing Thor warily.

“Of course. What could possibly go wrong?” Loki smiled at her with a glimmer in his eyes.

“Well… What could go wrong?” she asked a little frightened.

“Oh, the usual. Getting lost between worlds, pain, getting torn apart…” He gave her a bewildered smile.

Thor sprinted towards them, Mjolnir aimed for his brother.

“...or even death.” Loki finished and dragged them through the wall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thrive on comments <3  
> [Follow me on Tumblr](https://starscreamloki.tumblr.com/)


	11. Chapter 11

When she opened her eyes a familiar face was hovering above her. His raven black hair framing his face, yet his skin wasn’t fair as she had seen the first time but a blue with rigid markings, two red orbs boring into hers.

Quickly Kalypso scrambled to her feet and looked at Loki whose eyes frantically flicked around to left and right, fidgeting with his hands. She furrowed her brows as she took in his Jotun skin and he eyed her with narrow eyes.

“Well, I feel just as alive as I did before you dragged me through that wall,” she said sarcastically while patting the dirt of her suit.

Loki chuckled. “Yes, I would be disappointed if you had died.”

“One question though, where exactly are we, where do we need to go and will Thor not follow us any moment?”

“Which one of those do you want me to answer? You can only choose one since you only bargained for one,” he said while trying to keep a straight face, but a little smile tugged at the corner of his lip.

She smiled at him and patted him on the cheek. “Answer all three and I’ll put that illusion back,” she offered.

Loki gave her a wide smile, his teeth gleaming in the sunlight. “We are on the ridge of one of the cliffs two hours walking south from the palace.” Loki seemed to muse on that, “make it three hours. We have to climb up,” and he pointed up along the cliff. “That also answers your second question.” He chuckled when she rolled her eyes. “And no, Thor will not come after us because I froze the entrance when we passed through. But I think we mustn’t dwell because I’m sure he will have little challenge breaking the ice with Mjolnir.”

“So he will come after us you think?” she asked a little frightened.

“That is a fourth question,” Loki waged his finger.

She gave him a sweet smile, which was more sarcastic than sweet actually, and reached up to touch his cheek. Unwillingly Loki briefly leaned into the touch as the smell of rotten parchment filled the air around them, and her magic once more hooked on his being, leaving a faint flutter in his chest.

“Thor will indeed come after us, albeit it only to save you and probably kill me,” Loki said sour and turned to look up at the climbing task ahead of them. “Yet, he can travel very fast with that damned hammer of his and we are stuck with going on foot.” He sighed.

“I wouldn’t be so sure of that,” Kalypso said behind him while the smell of her magic still lingered in the air.

“How do you supo-” Loki’s words broke as he turned around and saw her hovering in the air, her magic steering the bones on her suit and keeping her afloat. Loki’s eyes narrowed. She was either gonna grab him and fly them to the palace, or she had another trick up her sleeve and Loki wasn’t very keen on finding out but he felt he wouldn’t have a choice. Reluctantly he asked, “and how is that going to help me?”

She chuckled. “Do you still have those little bones you got from me after I entered your nightmares?”

“Ah, finally a confesion,” Loki smiled. “But yes, I still have them. They are in my pocket. What are you pla- whoa!”

Before Loki was well aware he was up in the air, hanging sideways, quite literally dangling from his left hip where the little drop-shaped bones were stuffed in his pocket. He crossed his arms and gave her an angry look, which was in his ungraceful dangling more a comical look than threatening, and she snickered.

She levitated towards him and put her hand in his pocket to pull one of the bones out and floated around him to put it in his other pocket. Immediately the bone caught on to her magic and violently hauled him up right which made him yelp again. “Are you done?” he asked agitated, done being steered around as a marionette.

“That is a fourth question,” she said winking at him and guided them through the air.

“I didn’t even get to finish three of them.”

“Ah, but you got an answer on those three,” she retorted pompous. “But yes, I’m done. Any more jokes?” she challenged with a gleeful smile.

Loki snickered. “Just one.”

“Spit it.”

“No, it is a bad one.”

She gave him a amused look. “Yet I’m curious and asking you. Come on!”

“I just hope you know the difference between a Necromancer and a neck-romancer.”

She gave him an incredulous look. “Really Loki? That joke is older than you are!”

“Wouldn't you know! _Kerling_.”

They locked each other in a steel gaze before they bursted into laughter.

“Yeah, it’s bad,” Loki said and wrinkled his nose.

She looked down and as Asgard passed beneath their feet. “Where do you suppose is a good spot to land?” She asked scanning the horizon.

“Well, I think it is time to touch down and proceed on foot before the airforce spots us.” Loki peered around. “There,” he pointed at a cliff not a half hours walk from the palace, and Kalypso guided them down.

She looked at him while biting the inside of her cheek, her face screwed up in contemplation and they started walking.

“What goes on in that dead skull of yours?” Loki offered casually.

“Hasn’t Heimdall spotted us by now?”

“Probably.”

“And Thor would have arrived by now?”

Loki’s jaw clenched. “Possibly.”

“This isn’t going to be easy, is it?” She shivered.

“Nothing fun is,” Loki said while flashing her a dazzling smile.

 

***

 

When they neared the palace they often had to hide to dodge guards which patrolled the area.

“If only I had my magic,” Loki mumbled when they were crammed into the next tiny hiding spot, limbs entangled and making Loki feel more jittery than excited.

“Just get me to my phylactery and I will fix that,” she hissed under her breath.

They sprinted through the area while Loki guided them to a secret passage only he knew about and entered the Royal Gardens.

As they were walking through the gardens Loki suddenly grabbed her and pulled her into a tick bush. “Why wou-” the rest of her sentence was lost in muffeling as Loki roughly put a hand over her mouth and warily scanned the sky. When she looked up she briefly caught a glimpse of a red cape which now disappeared on a balcony.

“ _Now_ it isn’t going to be easy,” Loki grinned and dragged them out of the bushes and guided her through the gardens into the palace.

Carefully they picked their way through the place, using many of the servants passages that lay hidden in the walls and floor of the majestic building. When in one such passage Loki suddenly stopped and looked at the wall through which they could hear voices.

“What do you mean you let him out of your sight?” Odin’s voice boomed through the walls.

“Father I-”

“You were entrusted with this task and you failed!” Odin interrupted Thor.

Loki could almost imagine Thor cringing at those words and sighed. Just as he wanted to move on Thor’s words caught his attention.

“Maybe your punishment was too harsh!” Thor said with a raised voice.

“Do not question my judgement, boy!” Odin berated his eldest.

“Your judgement is wrong,” Thor defied his father. “You gave me a chance to prove myself, yet you didn’t grant him one and put the burden of cleaning up the broken pieces on my shoulders. How is that fair judgement?”

Loki’s jaw dropped. Did Thor just defend him? The same Thor who had him shackled and had dragged him across the nine realms like some sort of dog?

Kalypso tugged his sleeve, drawing him from his reverie, and pointed a thumb over her shoulder indicating that someone was coming. A little lost Loki looked to the end of the corridor to Kalypso and then to the wall through which Odin’s voice sounded again but Loki could not make out the words.

She placed her hand on his back and gently started to push Loki down the corridor until he shrugged her off and briskly resumed his trot.

After two more corridors and three more flights of stairs without any incidents, they entered the hallway that led to the vault. Einherjar were posted down the hall on either side and two more at the door to the vault. Loki knew they would never leave their post until replacement would arrive, and even then they were always on their guard. They had to fight their way through.

“Are you ready?” Loki asked her and she nodded, the smell of her magic already filling the air which alerted the guards. Briefly she touched him and the illusion of his Aesir form was gone.

Loki stepped away behind the pillar behind which they had been hiding and casually strolled through the hall until he met the first Einherjar. Quickly the others left their post to join their colleague, spears pointed at him and eyeing him warily.

“M-My prince,” one of the Einherjar stuttered.

“Move aside,” Loki commanded harshly.

“I’m sorry my Liege, I can not do that. We are under strict orders to arrest you when we encounter you.”

Loki didn’t answer but put on an evil and predatory grin, the Einherjar unwillingly taken a step back at his malicious smile, and Loki lunged forward, the knife he quickly had summoned leading.

The targeted Einherjar moved aside, anticipating the move, but one of his mates wasn’t so fortunate because Loki’s attack had been a rouse and with his foot he kicked out, connecting solidly with his temple, knocking him out with one blow.

Loki twisted and turned, placing his hand on the back of the other Einherjar and ice rapidly spread across his armour, locking the joints and rendering him unable to move.

From the corner of his eye Loki saw the Kalypso had joined the fray and soon they were fighting side by side in the same manner like they had done during the alien fight some weeks ago. They almost danced through the hall, flowing naturally past each other, helping the other when a hole fell in the defences, Frost and Death combined, and before the fight had even started, it had ended, all the Einherjar lying unconscious littered over the floor.

Carefully they picked their way between the unconscious bodies of guards to the door and Loki pushed it open, entering the vault while a rumbling roar rumbled through the hall, his brother calling his name once again.

Loki sighed exhausted, grabbed Kalypso and pulled her into the vault and shut the door and locked it just in time as the sound of metal hitting metal resonated through the room when Mjolnir hit the door on the other side.

 

***

 

Kalypso looked around the vault after they had walked down the stairs, carefully observing each item but touching none of them. “It isn’t here,” she said somber.

Loki huffed. “Not everything that is stored here is visible for the eye,” Loki said and sauntered around the vault stopping in front of the Tesseract and studying it. He felt the irresistible urge to grab it, and he would have done it, had he been able to access his dimensional pockets to stuff it away, but he wasn’t.

Yet.

With disdain he glanced to the Casket of Ancient Winters.

“Hey, this is the exact same place as your dream,” Kalypso said suddenly and Loki rolled his eyes.

“And you only figured that out now?” he asked with a sigh while he moved through the vault.

“I’ve been distracted, alright!” she spat at him. “It is the first time that my salvation was within my grasp.” Sadly she looked down and whispered, “and now it isn’t here.”

A loud clang echoed through the vault and they both looked at the door but it didn’t open.

Loki stopped in front of a large rock engraved with ruins on a low pedestal. “The tablet of Life and Time,” he muttered under his breath while eyeing the object. Slowly he walked around it to the back of the object and dropped to his knees, fidgeting with the pedestal.

“That doesn’t look like my phylactery at all,” Kalypso scoffed while eyeing his movements. “You know it is a-”

“Roll of parchment. Yes,” Loki said and pulled it out of the hidden compartment in the pedestal.

Kalypso’s eyes grew wide and upon the sight of her phylactery her form shifted, the grey and rotten skin pulled tight over her black bones, here eyes replaced by blue fire. “Salvation,” she mumbled with that voice that sounded like bone scraping over rock.

“It will only be your salvation if you keep up your end of the bargain,” Loki said and carefully walked closer to her.

Absently she nodded, her fiery eyes still fixed on the scroll.

A loud clang sounded through the vault and the doors burst open, followed by Thor’s booming voice. “Let her go!”

Loki darted past Kalypso and grabbed the Casket of Ancient Winters, turning as Thor came at him who stopped dead in his tracks, eyeing Loki with a mixture of curiosity and horror. Only then did Thor seemed to notice Kalypso’s new form and his eyes grew big and he looked back at Loki again.

“What?” Loki spat at him. “Oh, that’s right, you still haven’t seen the monster I truly am, have you?”

“Brother, I don’-,” Thor said a little to calm, his eyes darting over the ridgid markings on Loki’s face.

“You don’t what?” Loki asked venomous but Thor’s jaw only clenched and didn’t answer him. “Weren’t you the one who _would slay all the monsters_?” Loki taunted, circling him. “The big Thor who wanted to slay all the Jotuns and when push came to show wouldn’t let me do it?” Tears brimmed Loki’s eyes.

“Stop this madness brother.”

“I am not your brother,” Loki retorted with a cold voice.

“Loki, what happened to you that made you so bitter?”

“WHAT HAPPENED?” Loki screamed. “If for once in your life you would stop to listen instead of barrage your way through everything with sheer violence, then you might understand it,” Loki said biting through the tears. “Brother!” he added viciously.

“I can not let you harm her, I will fight you if I must,” Thor retorted with a coldness this time.

Loki took a step back, wounded by his words. Had Loki just not said that he shouldn’t use violence for once. Hadn’t he not nearly an hour ago defended Loki in front of Odin? Confusement washed over Loki’s face and he spotted that Thor tightened his grip on Mjolnir’s handle.

Loki sighed. “As you wish,” and he lifted the Casket of Ancient Winters while Thor stormed at him. Loki had to take a few steps back before he had Thor completely frozen and he had to duck to avoid Mjolnir who was flung at him.

“If only you would take the time to listen to what I say instead of trying to kill me, then perhaps brother you might understand.” Loki’s voice was almost a whisper, his voice shivering but with a certain detachment in it as he placed the Casket back on the pedestal he had taken it form and put something next to it.

Loki turned and looked at Kalypso who stood frozen as she had watched the interaction between the brothers, not having been willing to intervene.

“Release me,” she asked, her being seeming to sway a little.

“First do as you promised,” Loki commanded her. “Remove the magic that is blocking my Seidr.”

As if she was enthralled she walked to him, the fire in her eyes dimmed and glowed yellow instead of blue, and she placed a hand on his chest. She spoke, her voice monotone, “the spell will only lift by the grace of Odin or your death.” Dark tendrils of magic started to swirl around Loki, the smell of rot and death filling the air and making his eyes water.

“I am not Odin...”

The dark tendrils lingered up to Loki’s face, snaking up his mouth, nose, eyes and ears, his face contorted in fright as he felt the magical intrusion.

“...so you will have to die…”

Suddenly the dark magic hooked on his being and all his senses got blocked. He couldn’t see or hear, nor could he breathe and he could feel his unconscious slip as his last words tumbled from his mouth. “ _You Kerling_.”

A deafening silence filled the vault while Kalypso looked at the dark magic that kept Loki afload in the air, ripping through his flesh, mind and soul. A scream was frozen on his lips, his red eyes wide in horror and he twitched slightly in his last death throes.

The dark tendrils of magic started to evaporate and slowly Loki’s body sank to the floor, his skin black, the light in his eyes died.

The dark magic evaporated and behind her Thor who was still frozen in ice started to shiver a little, but the ice didn’t crack.

Kalypso looked down upon Loki’s lifeless body, the slight yellow fire in her eyes burned down to almost nothing but an ember.

The silence was deafening but suddenly it was broken by Loki who gasped loudly, breathing in all the air he could while Kalypso finished her sentence. “... if only for a moment.”

Loki jolted upright, his eyes watery, his ears and nose bleeding, his lungs burning and his entire body screaming in agony.

Breathing heavily the pain receded slowly and after the dizziness and the pounding in his skull had subsided a little, he looked up at Kalypso and spoke. “What have you done?” he asked her incredulous.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thrive on comments <3  
> [Follow me on Tumblr](https://starscreamloki.tumblr.com/)


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For this last chapter I want to shout out at @laralaufey who helped me form the actions in this chapter so everything is nicely set up for a next part of this series (more about that in the bottom note). And if you thought the last two chapters were angsty, well my dear readers, eat your heart out at this one!

“What have you done?” Loki asked while placing his hand on his chest where his heart was.

Kalypso didn’t answer as the yellow fire in her eyes turned blue.

Loki felt a familiar prickle in his veins and his Seidr rushed back to him, making him feel lightheaded but filled with joy and he used his magic to shift back to his Aesir form, a little too happy studying the pink skin with a wide smile on his face.

Kalypso’s rotten feet came into his view and he got pulled from his brief, joyfull reverie and looked at her. “Tell me, what have you done?” Loki breathed heavily while he rose to his feet.

The blue fire in her eyes turned yellow again as she spoke with the same monotone voice. “I killed you and brought you back from the dead.”

“And you made me an undead?” Loki asked, his eyes wide.

She didn’t answer.

“Answer my question!” He screamed at her while he put his hand on his chest again to feel if he still had a heartbeat.

“No, you died briefly, but it was enough to lift the curse.” Her raspy voice was cold.

Shouts could be heard from the hallway as more Einherjar ran to the vault.

Quickly Loki read the scroll that was Kalypso’s phylactery and a wide grin spread across his face. When the Einherjar entered the vault Loki looked at Kalypso and pointed at the guards. “Kill them,” he ordered malicious.

Kalypso turned on her heel and strode towards the Einherjar, her eyes blazing yellow once more while drawing her swords. She was quick and efficient while taking out the Einherjar, killing them with single blows and preventing any of them to pass her to get to Loki. Soon the floor of the vault was littered with their bodies lying in puddles of blood, red sprays across the room and gleaming from her swords when she turned back to Loki.

“Good Draugr,” he crooned and her fiery eyes turned blue again.

She looked at him and balled her bony fists, shifting back to a human form again, looking as beautiful as ever.

“I have held up my end of the bargain, now it is your turn to keep it,” she whispered, a little melancholy crossing her features.

Loki looked at the scroll of parchment in his hands and back to her, his eyes hard. “I might have changed my mind after reading it,” he said coldly.

Her eyes grew wide. “No, please,” she stammered, her breathing suddenly rapid. “Let me go.”

“Why would I? You just slaughtered a dozen Einherjar without getting wounded. You are already dead and I could use a partner in crime.” A sly smile played on Loki’s lips.

Anger burned in her veins and seeped through in her eyes. “You promised! We had a deal!”

“Yet you forgot I am the God of Lies,” he said with a wink.

“NOOOO! Let me go. PLEASE!” Her face contorted and if she could shed tears, her eyes would be brimmed with them.

“I don’t see the point,” Loki shrugged.

“I’ve chased after this so long, and now that it is within my reach, you take it from me.” Threateningly she stalked towards Loki, the smell of death filling the air.

Loki wagged the parchment in the air. “Stop!” he spoke the simple command and briefly her eyes flared yellow and she stopped advancing.

“Give me my salvation. I’m done, I don’t want this anymore. I have suffered enough. I have lost enough. Don’t take this away from me! Please, PLEASE, let me go! Destroy the parchment!”

“No,” Loki said coldly.

The smell of rotten parchment filled the air and she pointed at him, trying to steer the bones that were in his pockets but he only gave her a wide smile. “If you try to control the bones that were in my pockets, they are currently over there,” he pointed to the pedestal where the Casket of Ancient Winters was placed.

Her eyes grew wide and suddenly her face turned into a snarl as she hurled the bones towards him, trying to harm him by flinging them at his head but he dodged the bones and before she could reverse their course, he commanded her to stop.

She fell to her knees, tears she didn’t knew she could cry streaming down her face. “P-Please,” she whimpered.

“You don’t want to die, it is-”

“HOW DO YOU KNOW?” she screamed at him. “Of all people in the universe _you_ should know!”

“W-What do you mean?” Loki asked confused.

“I have walked your nightmares, I have seen you letting go of the Bifrost. I have seen, nay, I _felt_ every feeling that wrecked your heart at the hands of the Titan. I have seen what he did, and I have seen you BEG for the sweet salvation of death. I have seen you grovel at his feet, a whimpering mess to take your life but it wasn’t granted to you. You turned your heart just as dead as mine to feel nothing anymore, to survive!” Her voice cracked after her rant and she whispered hoarsely, “I survived instead of lived and now you deny me the very salvation that was denied you as well.”

She looked up at him and saw nothing but the raw emotions he had been covering up all this time. All the sorrow and guilt. All the lies that he had been told and he had told himself. All the fear, the rejection but above all the immense pain he had been put through, wrecking his heart and turning it cold indeed. It was all there on his face and his lip quivered.

“Please… Please…” she begged.

Loki stared at her, the words sinking in and hard and viciously striking a chord within him.

“You are not a monster, but don’t act like one,” she whispered still on her knees.

His head perked up at that and something in him shattered into a thousand tiny pieces and he finally understood what he had been feeling in the past couple of weeks.

Love.

He couldn’t deny any longer that it was love. She brought out his best and worst, could control and fuel it. She didn’t fear him nor treated him as a child, held him accountable for his actions even if she had dragged him into it and part of it was her fault. She didn’t try to put him in his place or rejected him. But above all, she understood him on a level others might not ever understand him, the feeling of being unmade, dancing like a puppet on strings just because others wanted to, the feeling of helplessness and loneliness. She understood him even though they had so many differences and those differences only complemented each other.

Loki clenched his jaw, his words barely a whisper as he felt the thousand shattered pieces rip his soul. “I don’t want you to go.”

She looked at him and rose to her feet, slowly walking to him and carefully placing a hand on his cheek. He leaned into her touch and closed his eyes.

“That is not your decision to make,” she spoke softly while caressing his cheek. “I don’t want to go either, but the part of me that doesn’t want to stay is stronger. Please understand that.”

Loki opened his eyes and looked into hers while placing his hand on hers. “I understand.”

With a sigh he handed her the parchment - her phylactery - and a tear rolled down his already tear stricken face.

“Thank you.” She slowly took her hand from his face, his head going with the motion not wanting to lose the touch but her hand was gone and he closed his eyes for a brief moment with another sigh.

When he opened them she was already moving, her destiny the Eternal Flame. Loki watched as she admired the flame and stuck her empty hand in there, the fire not harming her and she smirked.

Loki gave a small smile in return even though a part of him wanted to make a run towards her and grab her away from the flame, talk this idea out of her head, but he knew it was futile. She had made her choice.

She held the parchment above the flame and looked at him, her smile turning mischievous. “Don’t disappoint me,” she winked and let go of the paper.

Time seemed to slow down as the parchment drifted down through the air towards the licking fingers of the flame. He smiled wistful at her and then the parchment touched the devouring heat, setting it ablaze.

Her eyes turned yellow and the flames licking the parchment seemed to reflect in her eyes, the fire radiating from her pupils and the smell of rotten parchment filling the entire vault. Suddenly yellow flames engulfed her entire being and she screamed, the tone so high and raw it brought Loki to his knees, his hand scrambling to cover his ears.

He could feel his eardrums shatter and the blood trickled down his cheek into his neck. Next to him the frozen statue of Thor vibrated and the ice cracked, showering the area - and Loki - with sharp cold shards.

Thor landed on his knees as well and covered his ears while looking up at Kalypso who was covered in the flames. His mouth moved but the sound was lost to the banshee-scream Kalypso produced.

Suddenly all fell silent and Kalypso’s body crumbled before their eyes, the flames devouring her whole and leaving nothing behind.

Loki sprang to his feet and ran to where she had been, but not even ashes were left and the only proof she had ever existed were the scorch marks on the dark tiles of the floor and the smell of her magic.

Loki let out a shivering sigh and turned. Something in the corner of his eye caught his attention and he walked to it, picking up two little pieces of bone in the form of droplets, their intercrate patterns glowing yellow. “I won’t,” he whispered while he closed his hand and put his closed fist to his heart, standing there staring of into nothingness.

Only the smell of rotten parchment was all that was left of her.

 

***

 

Loki was drawn from his reverie as a hand suddenly was placed on his shoulder. He had been so deep in thoughts he nearly jumped out of his boots at the unexpected touch, but instead of screaming, he instinctively grabbed the hand and in one fluid motion twisted it on the arm it belonged to as Loki turned on his own axis as well.

“Ouch. Loki, it is me!” Thor’s deep voice rumbled.

Loki looked at his brother who was bending in an awkward angle but didn’t let go. “I don’t care,” Loki said coldly.

Thor harrumphed and pulled his arm from Loki’s grasp and straightened himself. He looked at his little brother and saw the grief and hate that burned in his eyes and Thor could feel his heart drop. “You loved her, didn’t you?” he asked softly.

“So, you finally listened?” Loki sneered at him. Loki’s entire body looked like he might lunge at Thor any moment, his muscles pulled taut like a spring cord, his face a mask.

“Brother…” Thor started but he didn’t know what to say. He had heard - and almost seen - everything that had transpired between Loki and Kalypso and his heart had ached at the heartbreak he had just witnessed.

“Brother, I -”

“Quit the _brother_ act,” Loki venomously spat at him. “I think by now it should be clear I am not your brother.” Loki’s eye twitched and he narrowed his eyes dangerously.

“No, not by blood, but you are by heart.”

“Then why, oh why, big brother, did you shackle me and drag me across the nine realms as if I was your pet? Why didn’t you defy the All-father sooner? If you truly are my brother by heart then you would’ve helped me instead of… instead of…” Loki was lost for words as a lump in his throat blocked his airway. Instead he just screamed at Thor, not attacking him or harming him but just venting the frustration and heartbreak he felt at that moment. Nothing but raw emotions that had ripped his soul into a thousand pieces and were now pouring from his lungs in that one scream.

“Because I didn’t know,” Thor retorted bitterly.

Loki sighed expasarated. “I told you before, because you never asked.”

“I’m here now,” Thor offered.

Loki looked at him emotionless and said nothing, sending a painful jab through Thor’s heart. Thor wondered if he was too late. If he could still bring Loki back from the brink of destruction, but he dared not ask or reach out and instead settled for a question that undoubtedly scratched Loki’s sore wound, but he had to know. “She was the Draugr I was hunting right?”

Loki only nodded and let out a shivering sigh.

Suddenly shouts were coming from down the hall along with the sound of hurried footsteps.

“Took them long enough,” Loki said scornfully. “I think that is my cue to leave. It was nice talking to you brother,” Loki said while making a little mocking bow.

“Don’t run away Loki,” Thor said threateningly.

“Oh, I will,” he said while eyeing the Tesseract.

“I will not let you,” Thor said through clenched teeth while Mjolnir flew to his outstretched hand.

“I thought you had finally listened to my words, yet you prove me wrong again.” Loki wrinkled his nose.

“I have listened. Yet I still am bound by the orders of the All-father. I can’t let you go even if my heart tells me otherwise,” Thor spoke sadly and lunged towards Loki who jumped aside and dove for the Tesseract. Just as his fingers almost reached the device, Mjolnir clipped his shoulder, tearing sinew and muscle and dislodging it from its socket, and Loki crashed face first to the floor.

Ignoring the pain from his torn shoulder Loki rolled over to his back to get up, but Thor was already upon him, Mjolnir hovering above his face.

Loki breathed heavily while eyeing the hammer hovering between his eyes and pressed his lips together. He let out a sigh and dropped his head to the floor, closing his eyes, surrendering in defeat. A sharp pain arched up his spine as Thor pulled on his arm and placed very familiar shackles around his wrists, his Seidr depriving from him and he felt the prickle across his skin as he became Jotun again.

“Well done, my son,” Loki could hear Odin say and Loki grimaced.

His mind wandered to Kalypso and he could see her face in his mind’s eye. His heart ached so much he thought it would stop beating on it’s own, but it didn’t. He could almost feel the droplet-formed bones in his pocket burn as he thought of her, almost still hear her voice while she spoke to him in his memory. “ _Don’t disappoint me._ ”

He wouldn’t. He had made a promise to her and this time he would keep it. But Loki couldn’t shake the feeling of sheer exhaustion that had washed over him during his conversation with Thor. He was tired of having to defend himself, and tired of explaining himself while the only person who would understand him was gone.

The next punishment probably already hovered above his head before Odin had even set foot into the vault, Loki cared not. Let them take him, for now he was done.

For now he was defeated, his heart broken and the future looking very meek, but he finally understood her choice.

Oh no, make no mistake, he wouldn't give up. He vowed then and there not to give up, not now, not ever. But he just needed time. Time to think, time to heal and time to come up with a new plan - or course of life if you will - but he wouldn’t stop fighting.

He had promised her.

 

**To be continued…**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the final chapter of this part of the fic since it is part of a series. For those of you who have visited my masterlist on Tumblr in the past week might have already noticed that the title of this series is: Courting Death.  
> I had hoped that by now that I had finished writing the next part but that isn’t the case. (Too many fics on my hands and other stuff.) This means you will all have to wait for a bit for the next part to come out. However… I can spoil the next title of this series which will be called: The Shadow of Yesteryear.  
> I hope you all enjoyed reading this as much as I loved writing it, and really, I thrive on comments, so please share your thoughts about this fic with me, I really love that!  
> Please be patient and a salute from me and Lokes <3


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